All Articles
All Published Articles
Static Pages
- This website is now frozen!
October 21, 2015, 20:25
The content of this website has been captured and is now frozen. Check out the NEW ubfriends.net! New features... Editable comments for up to…
- ubfriends is changing!
October 16, 2015, 08:43
Change is coming! Meanwhile, enjoy this first comment from Ben (which is the 2nd comment ever on ubfriends!…
- All Articles
June 9, 2012, 22:48
This page contains the site table of contents. Use it to quickly find content on this website.
- Contact Us
June 22, 2010, 15:32
No description found for this item.
- Prayers for Blogging
June 22, 2010, 15:30
Lord, make me an instrument of your peace; where there is hatred, let me sow love; where there is injury, pardon; where there is doubt, faith; where there is…
- Commenting Policy
June 22, 2010, 12:31
If you are posting a comment for the first time, your comment will not appear until it is approved by the administrator. This is a necessary part of our…
- Submit an Article
June 22, 2010, 12:20
UBFriends.org publishes material from Christian perspectives to edify believers and strengthen the Body of Christ. Because this website was launched by members…
- About This Site
June 22, 2010, 12:03
This website – pronounced "you-be-friends-dot-org" – is a virtual meeting place for members of University Bible Fellowship (UBF), their friends and family,…
Blog Posts
- ubfriends is changing (1)
October 17, 2015, 03:40
Change is coming! Meanwhile, enjoy this first comment from Ben (which is the 2nd comment ever on ubfriends!) Ben Toh (2010-06-25 16:17:39) "Hi Joe, You Be…
- Steven Hassan Interview (20)
October 14, 2015, 12:53
Please watch this. Steven Hassan and Brian Karcher discuss various topics from Steven's book "Combating Cult Mind Control" and Brian's book "Identity…
- I'm Praying For You (4)
October 13, 2015, 09:16
The words haunt me. Ever since my name showed up on the Sunday announcements as someone "struggling and in need of prayers", the words are a shower of…
- Unapologetic (3)
October 12, 2015, 13:25
Is sorry puppy always supposed to be sorry? This blog post discusses the phenomena of feeling the need to constantly apologize for one's existence. It's…
- Can being "right" be wrong? (6)
October 8, 2015, 14:10
"Many times being right is the same as being wrong." Acknowledgement that you do not monopolize the truth This blog is a response to Joe's excellent…
- Book Review: Combating Cult Mind Control (10)
October 8, 2015, 12:29
In 1990, Steven Hassan courageously published the book, Combating Cult Mind Control: The #1 Best Selling Guide To Protection, Rescue, and Recovery from…
- Four Signs of Healthy Community (45)
October 5, 2015, 11:02
Jean Vanier knows something about community. Born in 1928 as the son of a high-ranking official in the Canadian government, Vanier traveled the world and…
- Missionaries Must Nurture Relationships, Part 3 (11)
October 3, 2015, 14:38
A “Person of Peace” And The Family “I thank my God every time I remember you. 4 In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy 5 because of…
- The Unforgivable Sin (59)
September 29, 2015, 09:21
Have I committed the unforgivable sin? This coming Sunday I will preach on The Unforgivable Sin from Isaiah 22. One of my Bible students has asked me repeatedly…
- A Different Type of Shepherd (3)
September 28, 2015, 19:06
Those who know me only know me a short while before I recommend Gk. Chesterton’s Orthodoxy. I am not sure I would not be a Christian today had I never found…
- PART 1 Operation #exposeUBF (16)
September 25, 2015, 11:55
“Dear UBF, I am your worst nightmare” ABOUT ME Born in Chicago, and Son to Korean missionaries, I lived within the UBF system from birth to high…
- Sensation over Sense (6)
September 24, 2015, 12:31
Huffington Post BK recently submitted an article about Trump and Evangelicals. And it made a lot of sense. But what doesn't make sense is how much media…
- Marks of True Believers (17)
September 23, 2015, 20:05
At West Loop, I’ve been preaching on Isaiah every Sunday since the end of June 2015, beginning with How Stupid Can You Be (Isa 1:1-9). This coming Sunday…
- (I am) A Light to the Gentiles (26)
September 22, 2015, 09:07
“We all like sheep have gone astray…” – Isaiah 53:6 Dear spiritual children, It seems as though the words in my last testimony made you react…
- Missionaries Must Nurture Relationships, Part 2 (19)
September 19, 2015, 10:48
“The eye cannot say to the hand, “I don’t need you!” And the head cannot say to the feet, “I don’t need you!” (1 Cor 12:21, NIV) The Christian…
- Why Trump and Evangelicals Go Together (15)
September 18, 2015, 05:10
Yesterday I got some exercise by walking 4 miles around Las Vegas. On the way back I saw one of the buildings in Donald Trump's hotel empire. It dawned on me…
- Let 100 Flowers Blossom (5)
September 16, 2015, 10:36
This week I had the privilege to listen to Guy Kawasaki speak. It is refreshing to learn from an actual world-class leader. Guy is "one of the Apple employees…
- The Conundrum of Approval (1)
September 13, 2015, 23:18
“If you just set out to be liked, you will be prepared to compromise on anything at anytime, and would achieve nothing.”- Margaret Thatcher. Chapel with…
- I will make you kosher (5)
September 13, 2015, 00:15
My favorite line So in August ubfriends started a book club. The book was A Fellowship of Differents by Scot Mcknight. I thoroughly enjoyed the book, good…
- Can UBF Divide a Marriage? (18)
September 11, 2015, 08:43
Introduction: After a gradual, but long time struggle with leaving UBF I wanted to review an aspect not directly addressed by many people. As a single…
- Missionaries Must Nurture Relationships (14)
September 9, 2015, 18:20
1 Corinthians 12:18-19 “But as it is, God arranged the members in the body, each one of them, as he chose. 19 If all were a single member, where would…
- Prepare the way for the Lord (65)
September 7, 2015, 16:56
I want to share my testimony from this week’s message because I feel that sometimes the positive things about UBF are not heard on this site. I hope that…
- Identity Snatchers (24)
September 6, 2015, 06:32
Over a year ago, I wrote a provocative article here on ubfriends, entitled Shepherd Brian is Dead. It is an unfortunate reality that in order to have any…
- When Christians Make Christianity Ugly (19)
September 5, 2015, 13:13
We Christians are firmly convinced that we should choose between: God and sin, God and money, right and wrong, good and bad, heaven and…
- The Ubferator! (10)
September 3, 2015, 21:51
Hey everyone, we just topped 19,000 comments! The conversations have been rather heavy lately, so I thought we could all use a good laugh. I am in tears from…
- Horrible Things Happen to Those Who Run Away (27)
September 2, 2015, 10:23
In retrospect, one of the weirdest aspects of being in UBF during the 1980’s and 1990’s was listening to stories told by Samuel Lee. In his Sunday messages…
- Back to School (7)
September 1, 2015, 10:35
Yesterday we sent off our second daughter to college. Wow, time flies so fast! My wife and I are so thankful there is no ubf chapter there :) To celebrate this…
- The Nuances of Honesty: Criticism and Cynicism (16)
August 29, 2015, 09:40
"Criticism- doubt informed by curiosity and a deep knowledge of a discipline related to your work... Cynicism- doubt resulting from ignorance and antiquated…
- Matthew 15 (6)
August 27, 2015, 22:50
I have heard tradition described accurately as giving a vote to our ancestors. As with all principles, the principle which explains the law supersedes it. In…
- Why So Many Are Done With UBF (41)
August 26, 2015, 08:13
Admin note: Committed Christians--including more and more 2nd gens--leaving UBF is a reality that some leaders do not wish to face, acknowledge, address or…
- They want Christ, not Christians (41)
August 22, 2015, 13:28
"I like your Christ; I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ."- Mahatma Gandhi Going back to Seminary produces mixed…
- Are you in a Christian ministry? (9)
August 20, 2015, 08:49
Before we publish MJ's excellent new article, I want to share a few mid-week thoughts. Ben's recent comment about being HOT (honest, open and transparent)…
- I am not Anti-War, I am Pro-Peace (9)
August 17, 2015, 21:24
"I was once asked why I don't participate in anti-war demonstrations. I said that I will never do that, but as soon as you have a pro-peace rally, I'll be…
- End The Endless Self-Pruning... (8)
August 11, 2015, 19:27
...And Instead Dwell In Christ. Admin note: Reading Kevin's testimony, I immediately resonated with what he shared below. I know that the Christian life…
- Walking in the Shoes of the Other (16)
August 11, 2015, 09:23
Empathy. The ability to understand and share the feelings of another. I am blessed and cursed with empathy. It's one of my top 5 strengths based on multiple…
- You eat-a no meat-a?! (25)
August 8, 2015, 09:14
“I see it all perfectly; there are two possible situations — one can either do this or that. My honest opinion and my friendly advice is this: do it or do…
- My thoughts on the 2015 Follow Me Conference (40)
July 25, 2015, 18:53
As many of your know last weekend America took one step closer to becoming a kingdom of priests and a holy nation at the 2015 Follow Me conference. Although I…
- Why would anyone ever want to be a Christian? (46)
July 22, 2015, 12:06
(This is the reflection I wrote at the Midwest Summer Bible Conference 2015) Luke 9: 25 "What good is it for a man to gain the whole world, and yet lose…
- Have the Conversation on LGBTQIA – Part 4 (85)
July 20, 2015, 23:10
Here is my last part of the LGBTQIA conversation presentation. Even as I share these articles, my PowerPoints are changing, correcting and transforming. I plan…
- Have the Conversation on LGBTQIA – Part 3 (7)
July 18, 2015, 22:45
Thousands of former members have noticed the oppression at UBF stemming from spiritual abuse. Hundreds have documented their stories publicly on the internet.…
- Affirming and Non-Affirming (37)
July 17, 2015, 12:44
(The picture may be the response of some on "both sides" to "the other side.") What I will no longer say. Probably until a few years ago, I would have…
- The Tank Man: Language Defines Reality (11)
July 16, 2015, 09:23
A Chinese protestor blocks a line of tanks heading east on Beijing's Changan Blvd. June 5, 1989 in front of the Beijing Hotel. The man, calling for an end to…
- Have the Conversation on LGBTQIA – Part 2 (5)
July 14, 2015, 12:48
I plan to continue sharing each summary. Feel free to jump in at any time. I hope to share my reactions to questions posed to me from time to time by…
- Have the Conversation on LGBTQIA - Part 1 (36)
July 12, 2015, 13:39
The defining question of the church in our generation, like it or not, has become this: What is your view on homosexuality? So instead of pretending this…
- Is America Free? (11)
July 8, 2015, 19:54
The spark of this article is a lecture we held at West Loop entitled "Homo-liturgics (Understanding our humanity through the act of worship and the litrugy)."…
- Notes for Midwest Conference 2015 Part 1 (4)
July 6, 2015, 15:32
We are a few weeks away from the Midwest conference. The questionnaires were carefully made and chosen. I have developed below some other notes on the passage…
- Defiance (20)
July 4, 2015, 09:05
Today is Independence Day here in the USA. It seems to be the most somber 4th of July I can remember. Quite a few people are exhausted from the culture war…
- My 7th Book (21)
July 1, 2015, 08:13
The recent Christianity Today book review of a UBF 2nd gen's book "The Spirit Moves West" prompted me to get back to a book draft of my own. Rebecca Kim's book…
- Meaning, Application, Message (14)
June 21, 2015, 08:41
For those interested, I would really like to have more theology related discussions here. I have been learning that a robust and helpful understanding of the…
- Don't be proud (1)
June 10, 2015, 13:36
Dr. Ben Toh recently posted an article about pride. He asked some questions about pride and on his blog gave some questions to help someone determine what a…
- A Culture of Burden (26)
June 10, 2015, 11:15
"Answer to Brian's post June 3, 2015" Hello, Everybody, My name is Sigrid Goff. I used to belong to Cologne UBF in Germany, then to Washington UBF…
- Are UBF people and UBF churches humble? (15)
June 5, 2015, 10:10
Do you belong to a proud or a humble church? Are you a proud or a humble person? How can we really tell if we are proud or humble? We might excuse our pride,…
- My Personal Theology of Intercultural Ministry (5)
May 28, 2015, 16:08
After reading some of the comments on this site I do agree that the interactions that take place are perfect material for a psychologist to analyze. Sometimes…
- The Blessed Life (5)
May 26, 2015, 11:02
Because I have found myself in the unofficial, unsanctioned exit counselor role for ubf, people from ubf have contacted me for help at the rate of once per…
- Memorial Day 2015 (2)
May 24, 2015, 10:59
Memorial Day in the United States is a day of remembering the men and women who gave their lives defending freedom. It is a day of somber remembrance and…
- What I Learned from Tangled (3)
May 22, 2015, 12:09
I hope to participate in the upcoming ubfriends book club. But in the meantime, maybe we can also have a movie club. The movie Tangled was the most significant…
- Ubfriends Book Club (59)
May 11, 2015, 15:02
Hey ubfriends community, how's about we form a good ol' book club on this site? After seeing some of the theology-related comments and perusing some of the old…
- What is your gospel? (140)
May 8, 2015, 12:12
Someone astutely pointed out here in the latest blitzkrieg of comments that one key issue between many of those who criticize ubf and many of those who…
- Two Things I Want To Say to Every Sheep (202)
May 4, 2015, 15:14
Once you join UBF bible study, two words will forever be seared into your mind: shepherd and sheep. Everything at UBF depends on this fundamental relationship.…
- What Not to Say to Someone Who Has Been Hurt By Church (168)
May 1, 2015, 09:47
It is no secret that this website has become a place where people who have had bad experiences in University Bible Fellowship gather to share their stories.…
- Why I Say UBF is a Cult (82)
April 30, 2015, 12:37
As promised, here is my third installment in my three part article series. I am well aware of the provocative title in this third article. This is intentional…
- Why I Love Westloop UBF! (15)
April 30, 2015, 06:43
I was prompted yesterday by Ben's comment to share how much I love the church at Westloop UBF. They share the gospel through worship The first thing…
- What just happened here? (90)
April 29, 2015, 15:42
Let's cut to the chase. Let's all take a step back and process what just happened here on ubfriends and at ubf the past several weeks. The main event that…
- Critique My Sermon: Incarnational Spirituality (43)
April 27, 2015, 15:23
This sermon was delivered on April 26th, 2015 at West Loop UBF. Please feel free to rip it apart and tell me how it could have been better :) Introduction…
- What Cs Lewis had to say to college students (1)
April 25, 2015, 21:07
Did you know Cs Lewis once gave a commencement address? Cs Lewis is largely regarded as the most influential Christian in the last century. If you…
- A Response to Joe's Open Letter (154)
April 23, 2015, 17:21
As one who has been participating in University Bible Fellowship for many years, I’d like to offer my thoughts on some of the points in Joe's recent open…
- Inspired to Love the Church by a Gay Christian (111)
April 20, 2015, 08:25
In April 2012 I was baptized by full immersion at our local Christian church. It was a wonderful and godly experience. The pastor's words "You are free from…
- Another John 10 Testimony (14)
April 13, 2015, 12:47
Recently someone shared a quote with me "You own everything that happened to you. Tell your stories. If people wanted you to write warmly about them they…
- Marry the One you Love or Love the One you Marry (7)
April 7, 2015, 21:15
Love and marriage. A friend from Malaysia made a comment to me yesterday. He said, “In the west people marry who they love. But in the east people love who…
- Scapegoating, Ignatian spiritual practice, and the subversive gospels of Passion Sunday and Good Friday (31)
April 2, 2015, 14:07
The recent film Kill the Messenger is based on the true story of a reporter named Gary Webb who worked for a mid-sized newspaper during the 1990’s. By…
- FOLLOW ME Means Repent, Deny Yourself, Lose Your Life and Make Disciples (19)
March 24, 2015, 00:57
“What did Jesus really mean when He said, ‘Follow Me?’” This is the title of a small pamphlet by David Platt that a friend showed me. I eagerly read…
- A 2nd Gen Story (17)
March 21, 2015, 08:37
Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that their deeds will be exposed. But whoever lives by the truth comes into…
- West Loop’s first sermon in 2008: Where is your vision? (2)
March 20, 2015, 17:21
Editorial note: While searching for an old email, I happened to find the first sermon preached at West Loop UBF on Jan 6, 2008. It is over 6 years ago. I feel…
- My Feelings about UBF (25)
March 18, 2015, 09:29
Here is a somewhat poetical but not completely poetical writing I wrote about what I would tell my Pastor if I thought he would listen. How I want to cry…
- My Last Few Days in Chicago (17)
March 12, 2015, 14:35
The closing testimonies at Campus night last Friday were given by Moses Noah, Jim Rabchuk, and Ron Ward. The title on the program was “Campus mission,…
- The Work of Satan in Mexico (81)
March 11, 2015, 10:14
In light of the public prayer topic for our ubfriends in Mexico, I would like to share some news so that you can pray more clearly about the situation.…
- My Own Response (13)
March 10, 2015, 10:08
I watched two Facebook videos the other day. http://www.upworthy.com/a-customer-walked-into-his-pizza-shop-and-changed-philadelphia-with-1-and-a-single-post-it…
- My First Few Days in Chicago (32)
March 9, 2015, 16:30
Last Friday Chicago held a campus mission night. I traveled from St. Louis to Chicago for the event. My pastor had the missionary meeting so he was not…
- The Power of Now (10)
March 6, 2015, 12:41
What if we figured out and did good and right things now? What if we had already done them years, even decades ago? On the other hand, what if we don't do them…
- Prayers for the Church (16)
March 4, 2015, 12:59
The Bride of Christ could use some prayer right now. Here are some excerpts from The Book of Common Prayer. Will you agree with me on these? For the…
- An Open Letter to the President of UBF (136)
March 2, 2015, 16:38
The following is an open letter to Dr. Augustine Sohn, President of University Bible Fellowship, from Joseph L. Schafer, dated March 2, 2015. Dear…
- Telling it to the Church, Part 3 (92)
February 28, 2015, 21:44
Yes, the time has finally arrived. The moment that handfuls of you have been waiting for. After a two-year hiatus, we pick up the story that began with…
- Excerpts from the Penguin Narratives (13)
February 27, 2015, 09:27
At one point in my life, I thought I had Christianity all figured out. I felt the twinge of pride as I “kept the faith” while people around me seemed to…
- Turning Pressure into Beauty (90)
February 26, 2015, 13:26
Pressure. It builds, it mounts and then it explodes. And it is the one reason my fellow outlaw preacher, John O'Keefe, claims as the primary reason people are…
- And as I slept, I dreamed a dream... (18)
February 24, 2015, 23:07
Admin note: This is a short story titled The Pilgrims. It was contributed by Ryan Prins, a former student at Penn State, and originally published in 2009. We…
- UBF and Dialogue: What Joe, Charles and Pope Francis Say (33)
February 24, 2015, 10:25
Admin Note: Having a genuine meaningful dialogue in UBF is a very important issue that absolutely needs to be seriously addressed and practiced. I say this…
- The Pain of Leaving UBF (19)
February 21, 2015, 09:43
(Admin note: I, Bento, did not ask permission from Joe to post this. I’m making an assumption that he would be OK with me doing so since he posted it on…
- Flying From New York (24)
February 19, 2015, 09:20
There was once a man flying from New York to Omaha. In the airport garage he was attacked by a gang. They took his laptop, his wallet and his cell phone, beat…
- A short comment on brainwashing (9)
February 18, 2015, 11:02
When I was 4 I asked my mother how I didn’t know I was living in a dream. She stood confused, contemplating the question herself. I don’t remember what…
- Darkness at New York UBF (67)
February 17, 2015, 12:10
When we received the "Utmost Respect" letter at ubfriends, a good discussion about making apologies followed. Joe asked a great question in this discussion,…
- Utmost Love and Respect (24)
February 14, 2015, 14:43
Last time I had an argument with my wife, I was confident I was right and she was wrong. I had been wrong many times before. But I was sure this time I…
- Matthew 3 Testimony (6)
February 13, 2015, 15:47
This is a copy of my testimony from last Sunday that was given before the message. Today’s sermon really touched me. I felt like it spoke to recent events…
- Call for papers - Winter 2015 (5)
February 13, 2015, 11:03
Hey everyone, what do you want to read and discuss here? Anyone have an idea for an article to submit? If not, then you will have to listen to Ben, Joe and…
- A Response to the Problem of Spiritual Abuse in the Church (23)
February 5, 2015, 12:11
A succinct definition of spiritual abuse. Yesterday, Joe share what he regarded as the best article on spiritual abuse that he has ever seen. I agree. Here it…
- The Good and the Bad of UBF (61)
February 2, 2015, 11:29
The title is intentionally provocative, even if I genuinely mean it. It probably displeases “both sides.” (Sorry to say but there are “two sides,” as…
- American Sniper Makes you Proud To Be an American (23)
January 28, 2015, 14:54
I felt proud to be an American after watching American Sniper, directed by Clint Eastwood. It is based on the story of Chris Kyle, an American hero who is…
- My Thank You (16)
January 27, 2015, 17:45
My time here on ubfriends is growing short, at least for the near future. More and more of my time is being sown in other interests. I am in the midst of my…
- An Unedited Message
January 25, 2015, 21:07
This is the message I prepared in the Philippines. I was asked on a Saturday around 2pm. I typed it on a phone. I was allowed to pick anything, and I picked 2…
- Muslim - Christian dialogue: taboo or necessity? (43)
January 21, 2015, 13:22
I don't have to mention the news we get on TV nowadays related to the Middle East and what is happening there under the name of Islam - and it makes us…
- When Right is Bad and Wrong is Good (11)
January 20, 2015, 09:12
Constantly constipated. When I did what was “right” and played “by the book” I was rigid, inflexible, easily irritated, determined to "fix up sinners,"…
- If Not for Ubfriends I Would Not Be Getting Married (16)
January 18, 2015, 21:09
Although there are tons of marriage by faith stories out there, some good some bad- I in some sense feel that mine has a ring of uniqueness to it. Not to say…
- Missionary Empathy- 4 things I learned in the Philippines (13)
January 13, 2015, 23:49
I know that last time I said I was going to write about my marriage by faith, and I promise that I will post that in due time. I planned on posting it this…
- The Value of Acceptance (18)
January 8, 2015, 12:57
We just want to be accepted. This is often the cry of humanity. And far too often the response (directly or indirectly) of the Christian church is: You are not…
- The greatest struggle of my adult life (25)
January 6, 2015, 01:37
Marriage is the second biggest choice anyone ever makes outside of their choice to accept Jesus. Every culture the world over has marriage of some kind, along…
- Learning from Forests (5)
January 5, 2015, 10:15
What do you want to read? As many of you know I am about to be back from the Philippines after nearly a month stay. I have many things I could write about…
- Why UBF Should Read Brian’s Books and Know His Story Well (20)
January 3, 2015, 11:25
I ended 2014 with The Secret of Happiness and I begin 2015 with my friend Brian Karcher. Brian keeps UBF honest. Forests reviewed Brian’s first book and…
- The Secret of Happiness in 2015 (3)
December 31, 2014, 15:54
The last day of the year sets the stage for the first day of a brand new year. It inclines us toward having a bright optimistic outlook to start over anew and…
- Three Books for Free (8)
December 26, 2014, 13:10
As 2014 comes to a close, I want to share my three books with you that I published this year. Instead of retelling my story so much, it has been very helpful…
- A Consistent Blog (6)
December 20, 2014, 08:53
Well another year has passed! 2014 was a great year for our little blogging community. Somehow Ben, Joe and I managed to not lose our minds (or did we?). Here…
- Thank God for 2014 (10)
December 17, 2014, 11:46
2014 has been by far the most exciting year since 2009 when I went to college. I have so much to be thankful for. God's grace has truly been with me. Janua…
- West Loop UBF, 2008-2014 (7)
December 15, 2014, 14:21
Living with my head in the clouds. Last year I shared how West Loop (WL) UBF began in 2008. This is a follow up random, limited and selective reflection…
- Most Christ-like Heretics in 2014 (12)
December 14, 2014, 00:50
Do you know what it feels like to be called a heretic? Well I learned from the best! Here is a quick summary of the most Christ-like voices among the heretics…
- The Old Testament and Inspiration (45)
December 5, 2014, 13:53
I recently read an article authored by OT scholar and professor Peter Enns in which he discussed the compilation process of the OT (link to article here). This…
- Vox Populi Vox Dei (11)
December 2, 2014, 01:05
In times of trouble and conflict we are accustomed to call upon the practical man. Unfortunately the opposite is needed. For the practical man can only do the…
- How to Spot Contradictions (6)
December 1, 2014, 21:27
I suspect most of our readers here already know quite a bit about using logic and discerning truth from lies. If so, then I would love to learn more! As the…
- I Don’t Trust Dr. Ben (14)
November 24, 2014, 18:37
Highly autonomous. As a predominantly autonomously driven introvert and agent provocateur, the opinion of others likely affects me far less than it might…
- Misunderstanding Sin (40)
November 23, 2014, 00:41
He is IMPORTANT in the church. When a friend shared with me some horrible sin of a person in the church, I said, “For his sake and for the sake of the…
- What Samuel Lee Taught - Part 2 (7)
November 20, 2014, 06:24
"You are free from one man's teachings." I will forever remember those words. Those were the words spoken to me by Pastor Wayne, just before he dunked me under…
- What Samuel Lee Taught (53)
November 19, 2014, 14:34
After his passing in 2002, Lee is credited with 8 to 12 legacies that are being used as “core values” to define UBF throughout the world. But I’m…
- The Law Makes You Worse (8)
November 17, 2014, 06:53
Do’s and don’ts. Don’t flirt. Don’t lust. Don't watch porno. Don’t date...until you’re ready to marry by faith. Don’t be lazy. Work hard. Prepare…
- Ten Works of Satan (23)
November 14, 2014, 15:02
I’ve heard rumors that some at ubf ministry think I am doing the work of Satan or that I’m even Satan himself. Forests also reported hearing such things in…
- No More Excuses—an essay (2)
November 13, 2014, 19:28
I have to admit that the mention of UBF elicits several mixed reactions. On one hand, I personally received the grace of God’s love and salvation through…
- Do (not) Read Ubfriends (33)
November 13, 2014, 19:11
If I had a nickel for every time someone told me not to read this site or talk to BrianK or Ben Toh, I’d probably be a dollar richer. Unfortunately, for the…
- Question Everything (18)
November 11, 2014, 23:36
1 Thessalonians 5:21 “but test everything; hold fast what is good.” This is the 11th week of Seminary. The academic challenge I am getting here is very…
- Methods and Aims (19)
November 11, 2014, 23:31
“And there is this difference between the matter of aims and the matter of methods…”- Gk Chesterton, Heretics I recall a childhood story about a girl…
- Glimpses of the Gospel (7)
November 10, 2014, 12:53
Ok so my "indefinite time away" turned out to be not so long. It's been 10 days since I commented here, and 2 weeks since I posted an article. New world…
- Missions Conference 2014 Synopsis (5)
November 4, 2014, 18:42
There was a Missions Conference at Moody Bible Institute October 14-17, 2014. I wish all of you could have attended. It was completely free. I decided to make…
- The Symposium (33)
November 2, 2014, 11:58
I have only been in my current chapter for a little over a year now, but I feel like what happened last night was something, by accounts of many…
- Atonement Lessons From Losing My Dog And Cat (10)
October 29, 2014, 10:11
Last Sunday, I preached on Gospel Righteousness. My text, Rom 3:21-26, is regarded as "the center and heart of Romans,” "possibly the most important single…
- What is your song? (7)
October 27, 2014, 22:23
If there is a song that expresses your faith, your gospel, everything you believe and love right now, what is it? Here's mine. Chris…
- A Gentler and Kinder UBFriends (32)
October 27, 2014, 09:35
Gentle and kind. This follows my earlier comment to state again my simple (and perhaps naive) contention that the greatest likelihood of effecting positive…
- Why Christianity Needs Gay People (23)
October 25, 2014, 10:52
Now that I’ve processed a large portion of my recovery from ubf, I am free to rebuild and rework my theology. Two years ago, in October 2012, I was inspired…
- Sola Scriptura and Mr. Cs Lewis (6)
October 23, 2014, 21:16
Recently I was studying Galatians 1 with a friend. When I read the verse “if we or an angel from heaven should preach a gospel other than the one we preached…
- Lessons from Travis: The Marriage game (14)
October 18, 2014, 11:42
Who wants to play a game? The group of students paused in anticipation. “What’s the game?” a student asked excitedly. “Well it’s simple”…
- Misunderstanding Faith (16)
October 15, 2014, 09:29
“If you have faith, you can marry.” “If you have faith in God, you can raise 12 disciples.” Did I miscommunicate biblical faith? I used to make such…
- This is your Church (7)
October 12, 2014, 11:19
So for anyone at UBF, here is what your leaders think. This is your church in a nutshell. Why do you put up with such things? This is from a SL worship…
- How do other people react to you? (10)
October 12, 2014, 08:09
Ok so today's article comes right from Brian's beer church. For about two years now, I have not attended a church service, apart from visiting my friends at…
- Lessons from Travis: The good Christian (10)
October 10, 2014, 07:04
It was a day late in late summer. The light streamed through the window into a room with several high school students. Two Chinese girls sat on a couch and…
- What I Am Not Ashamed Of (2)
October 4, 2014, 10:03
My sermon for tomorrow is Gospel Power based on Rom 1:16. These are my rambling thoughts as to what I might preach extemporaneously tomorrow, which may change…
- An Introduction to Lessons from Travis (7)
October 3, 2014, 08:21
One of the problems that comes with teaching is knowing what was previously taught to your students. If you assume they know too much then you will expect too…
- John 10 Testimony (5)
September 27, 2014, 15:04
In the 10th chapter of John, Jesus explains he is the good shepherd. He uses a metaphor calling his elect sheep, and calling himself their shepherd. He says…
- Your food sucks! (6)
September 27, 2014, 10:10
How do you help a group of people whose lives are intertwined with a failing organization? How do you get through to owners who are in denial about the state…
- My Gospel Story of God's Grace (3)
September 26, 2014, 16:14
Forgiveness. I extemporaneously shared my story of God’s grace in my sermon last Sun: Gospel of Grace. I have previously shared parts of this before. I first…
- My Letter to the Committee (136)
September 24, 2014, 10:39
This week I sent the following letter to the UBF Ethics & Accountability Committee. I received an acknowledgement from one committee member that they have…
- Sanctification by Grace through Faith (53)
September 21, 2014, 08:03
How do we become free from the burden of sin? During a Q&A session after a church service where 2 Tim 3:6-17 was preached, someone asked “How do we…
- Obedience and PTSD (9)
September 19, 2014, 08:39
“Just obey” may cause PTSD reactions. Obedience might be a favorite word and teaching in UBF (and many other churches). I recently realized that it is also…
- The theology of “Gross!”: What modern psychology can teach us about purity, disgust, love, and the gospel (54)
September 15, 2014, 12:28
Back in January, I posted a sermon I delivered on Ephesians chapter 2. I wrote: In these verses, Paul makes the surprising claim that the law – God’s…
- This is My Life (5)
September 13, 2014, 14:41
“It feels like we are just floating in space.” That’s how one of my friends who left UBF ministry with me described how she felt after leaving. I can…
- From Certainty to Uncertainty (15)
September 10, 2014, 10:54
For 34 years and counting of being in UBF, I’ve heard countless testimonies titled something like, “From a Samaritan Woman to a Mother of Prayer,” or…
- How big is your binder? (19)
September 6, 2014, 10:37
Three ring, white binders. Remember those? This week my son needed several three-ring binders for High School. Of course, as good and faithful ubfers in the…
- Forests Top 10 Movie Quotes (4)
September 4, 2014, 08:22
The past few articles had various references to movies. I am a big can on top 10 lists. So in that aim I decided to give you my top 10 movie quotes. These…
- Toledo UBF Message - Just Obey (77)
August 31, 2014, 10:10
Now it's time for another Toledo UBF message review. This one is a doozy. The Message If you want to read the original message delivered in August…
- Suggestions for UBF Ethics Committee (56)
August 29, 2014, 20:47
I wanted to contact UBF Ethics committee but I could not easily find their contact information at ubf.org. If they are serious about making ethical reform…
- We have loved the light (10)
August 28, 2014, 19:11
Recently, Ben shared his thoughts on Mark Driscoll being removed from Acts 29. As I read more and more articles and comments, I am more and more amazed at how…
- The Sacred Secular Divide (2)
August 26, 2014, 19:34
I used to consider some activities as spiritual (sacred) and others as worldly (secular). Spiritual. I thought that carrying out 1:1 Bible studies on the…
- My Baptism Testimony (14)
August 25, 2014, 14:01
Editorial note: Nianzu Ma is a graduate student at UIC (the University of Illinois at Chicago) studying for his Ph.D in computer science. He fellowships with…
- True Love’s Kiss (22)
August 22, 2014, 15:46
Not necessarily a chick flick! This is a random, jumbled musing after I finally watched Maleficent, which was thoroughly satisfying. It reminded me of Frozen.…
- My Mother (27)
August 17, 2014, 08:22
It seems like every other week in the comments I see people arguing about Samuel Lee. Some think the judgment is if he was a terrible, or the most terrible man…
- To be or not to be...a shepherd (10)
August 14, 2014, 11:43
I recently heard a story of a man from a UBF chapter far far away from me. The topic of him becoming a “Shepherd” had been raised numerous times to him and…
- On Heresy (11)
August 10, 2014, 08:18
I always thought when I met a heretic I would know exactly what to say. I would be armed with all my beliefs and I would quickly dismantle such an argument.…
- Mark Driscoll Removed from Acts 29 (146)
August 8, 2014, 17:47
What we can learn from Mark Driscoll’s removal from Acts 29? The big news in Christendom today. Acts 29, a national church planting group with 500…
- 2 Corinthians - Section 2
August 2, 2014, 08:19
N.T. Wright’s study guide continues with the text of 2 Cornithians 2:5-3:18. This sectioning off of Scripture is teaching me a highly valuable lesson:…
- Why I will not try to obey the OT Law (62)
July 30, 2014, 12:55
So you are not even going to try to obey God's Law? Nope. Not even a little? No. Aren't you afraid of backsliding? No. Don't you fear God? Not anymore, no.…
- 2 Corinthians - Section 1 (18)
July 27, 2014, 09:10
N.T. Wright's study guide is remarkably easy to understand and yet opens doors of deep thought. Section 1 is entitled "The God of all Comfort". Clearly the…
- How Great Leaders Inspire Action (6)
July 25, 2014, 17:52
Right now, I’m on the road. This summer I visited three different countries over the span of 6 weeks. It is tiring living out of a suitcase, but the good…
- Not Understanding Older Brother Sins (3)
July 22, 2014, 08:31
Is the older brother a “bad” sinner? For over two decades, whenever I studied the Parable of the Prodigal Son (Lk 15:11-32), I fully understood and…
- 2 Corinthians - Suggestions from Wright (13)
July 13, 2014, 09:44
Bible study. Questions. These things surprisingly still invoke a mild fight-or-flight response in me. Can I trust the study guide? What ideology are these…
- How I Experienced God (7)
July 8, 2014, 06:27
A friend asked me to preach a sermon on “Kingdom and Church.” This sounded rather broad and abstract. I wanted to decline because I have no idea what to…
- 2 Corinthians Study - Introduction (10)
July 7, 2014, 14:24
One of the freedoms I have been enjoying is the new-found freedom to work out my personal belief system as a bible learner. I started by believing only one…
- The Six Stage UBF Training Model (61)
July 6, 2014, 16:40
The most important aspect everyone needs to understand about UBF ministry is the six-stage training process. When I joined in 1987, no one had ever…
- My Reaction to the 2014 Staff Conference (48)
July 5, 2014, 11:06
Did you attend the latest ubf staff conference? What is your reaction to this conference? How do you feel about it? Here is my reaction to the Sunday lecture…
- On Our 20th Anniversary (21)
July 2, 2014, 05:08
Marking anniversaries. I can't help it! ubf conditioned me to mark each year and to write my own history. Each conference was so historical! But my wife and I…
- Answers from Lumen Fidei (5)
June 30, 2014, 14:48
I recently came across a document called the Lumen Fidei. It was more than insightful. The Lumen Fidei (light of faith) is a letter of Pope Francis that was…
- Authority and Common Sense (8)
June 28, 2014, 08:59
One unspoken rule I have noticed in traditional UBF chapters is there is this idea that life decisions and choices must be approved by a pastor or shepherd…
- Sometimes we need Hero and Villain (13)
June 23, 2014, 09:01
Sometimes theologians and church people forget how culture expresses the "spirit of the times" and that such expressions can have something profound to teach…
- Forests Proposes A Toast (8)
June 18, 2014, 06:42
Seeing as I was in such a rush to have dinner with Ben Toh, I failed to give a toast to my roommate and Ben West. I have chosen to present my toast a few days…
- Six Stages of Training (25)
June 14, 2014, 09:57
Ben's excellent article, "Good Teachers Make Themselves Unneeded", which was inspired by a friend's C.S. Lewis quotes, inspired me to expound on a topic I…
- Good Teachers Make Themselves Unneeded (12)
June 12, 2014, 22:16
How to be a good Bible teacher. A friend shared on Facebook an extremely insightful and useful quote by C.S. Lewis from The Four Loves. I think that if all…
- God, Not Man, As Shepherd (3)
June 11, 2014, 11:59
Lacking nothing. I read Ps 23:1 this morning, which resonated with me. God is my Shepherd. I felt deeply that I truly lacked nothing, which is nothing but…
- He Is
June 10, 2014, 12:35
This video is stunning and amazing. Would not all Christ-followers…
- My Dad (10)
June 9, 2014, 18:45
I am working on my sermon next Sun with the theme of Father for Father's day. Then I began thinking about my dad. Love. My dad died two decades ago in the…
- Admin: Technology update (11)
June 7, 2014, 20:17
Hey everyone, our website was down this evening for a while, 6/7/2014. I contacted our web host and found out there was a performance issue with the server we…
- How do you communicate with God? (6)
June 4, 2014, 12:42
I understand that I just asked a big question, and one that will certainly not be answered in this short article or on this forum. But it is a question that I…
- Legalism (2)
June 3, 2014, 13:14
This is NOT written about UBF. This is from Tough Topics by Sam Storms on legalism, which is related to my previous post: Galatians Set Me Free From Legalism. …
- Blogging My Books (3)
May 31, 2014, 13:04
As someone suggested, I decided to blog some of the content of my two books online. Each book is about 100 pages, so I decided to just blog important sections…
- Galatians Set Me Free From Legalism - Part 2 (32)
May 30, 2014, 08:58
As a follow up to an article I didn’t write I think it only apt to say that Galatians Set Me Free From Legalism was the best article I never wrote. That…
- What To Do and Believe Daily (9)
May 28, 2014, 11:40
Yesterday, a graduate student who met me for Bible study for the first time asked, “What do you do when you feel disconnected with God? Distant from God?…
- Wish Dream Destroys Christian Community (38)
May 26, 2014, 08:28
In my sermon yesterday (5/25/14), C is for Community, I shared extemporaneously about “wish dream,” a phrase coined by Dietrich Bonhoeffer in his classic…
- Jesus is the Door (12)
May 25, 2014, 09:00
Today I woke up with John 10 on my mind, and immediately I began thinking of my comments about being baptized by Pastor Wayne. When I re-read the comments on…
- Rest Unleashed - Narrative 3 of 3 (5)
May 24, 2014, 13:35
The last and longest narrative in my book, Rest Unleashed: The Raven Narratives, is my story. So far, my journey has begun with considering forgiveness and the…
- Rest Unleashed - Narrative 2 of 3 (1)
May 24, 2014, 07:31
My journey continues by considering the gospel of Jesus. Narrative 2 expresses my seeking answers to one massive question: What is the gospel? I know the easy…
- Rest Unleashed - Narrative 1 of 3 (11)
May 23, 2014, 13:08
Based on DavidW's advice in his recent article, I decided to "blog my books" here. So I'll present three articles for each of my two books over the next…
- Book Review: Fundamorphosis (3)
May 22, 2014, 11:55
How could he know? That question surfaced in my mind over and over again as I read Robb Ryerse's new book, Fundamorphosis. How could someone I never met, who…
- Generation: Found (12)
May 20, 2014, 18:31
What was the originally intended purpose of Ubfriends? The mission statement of the site says: Our purpose is to foster open interpersonal communication on…
- B is for Beauty (10)
May 17, 2014, 12:59
Please critique what I wrote for my sermon tomorrow: B is for Beauty. Thanks for the helpful comments last week on A is for Accountability. As a result I…
- Book Review - I Choose: Subtlety in Cults (18)
May 16, 2014, 08:54
When I heard about the new book by Isabelle Renaud, "I Choose: Subtlety in Cults", I bought one on Kindle for my phone. This is a great read if you want…
- Tired of Talking About UBF (29)
May 13, 2014, 20:21
Note: this article is for those who have decided to remain in UBF but are endlessly frustrated. It is not for everyone to remain in UBF, so I understand and…
- What next? Four books (26)
May 12, 2014, 13:02
Today our new Friend submitted a thoughtful, heartfelt and well-articulated article entitled "What next?" I want to share my response as an article instead…
- What next? (57)
May 12, 2014, 06:23
After committing to catching up on previous posts, I found myself staying up the entire night trying to cover nearly 5 years of articles and comments. With…
- A Biblical Response to the UBF Definition of Church (57)
May 11, 2014, 06:56
The new UBF history website created in 2013 attempts to define “church” on this page. After that, it tries to build a case, based on this definition, for…
- New UBF Heritage Guarding Website (84)
May 10, 2014, 15:27
Have you heard? UBF loyalists opened a new website recently. The purpose is to guard and protect and pass on the UBF heritage. Some people might have thought I…
- Critique my Sermon on Accountability (26)
May 10, 2014, 13:04
Do freely give me feedback on my sermon which I will preach extemporaneously tomorrow: A is for Accountability. The four parts of the sermon are: Why…
- It is Very Good (87)
May 7, 2014, 19:13
In the last few weeks I have posted some content on this site that might be labeled as “critical” or “negative”. This obvious question I might get is…
- Reflections on Today's Daily Bread (97)
May 6, 2014, 18:10
Dear Readers: We, the administrators of UBFriends, were deeply moved by this morning's Daily Bread passage and accompanying commentary that appeared on…
- Book Review: Rest Unleashed (21)
May 5, 2014, 18:00
I feel it necessary to explain my relationship with Mr. Brian Karcher and how I became a close friend of a man whom I've never met. My pastor frequently asks…
- Testimony - Galatians 6 (42)
May 4, 2014, 20:01
A certain someone named BK told me to be direct with my testimony this week. The message this week was on Galatians 6. BK must forgive me, because his book…
- Book Review: God and the Gay Christian (64)
May 3, 2014, 10:18
In 1992, Pope John Paul II apologized to Galileo. 359 years earlier, Galileo and those who listened to his teachings were condemned by the church. The church…
- Galatians Set Me Free From Legalism (266)
May 1, 2014, 15:02
Are you free from legalism? Reading and studying Galatians in 2009 set me free---28 years after becoming a Christian. This freedom and exhilarating liberation…
- Book Review: Washed and Waiting (30)
April 29, 2014, 20:56
This discussion needs to be had. I have corresponded with homosexuals, atheists and those who are marginalized in numerous ways-- people in the UBF community.…
- Feelings, Actions and Thoughts (40)
April 26, 2014, 17:50
Warning: This is a random, rambling, ruminating reflection! I’ll start with a painful and shameful confession. For the first two decades of my marriage, I…
- It’s more fun in the Philippines – Part 3 (11)
April 24, 2014, 13:06
In part 2 of my report of the Philippines, I mentioned some initial impressions of my time. I now want to speak of the actual content of the conference, and…
- It’s more fun in the Philippines - Part 2 (35)
April 23, 2014, 06:46
In Part 1 I spoke of the lead up to my trip. This story is the story of my trip so I will begin with my initial impressions. When I last left Paul had spoken…
- It’s more fun in the Philippines - Part 1 (7)
April 22, 2014, 18:30
It is very hard to start this story, because in some sense my trip has changed me in remarkable ways. Maybe it’s best if I start at the start. Why did I…
- Who's Talking about ubfriends? (21)
April 22, 2014, 12:52
Who are the top commenters here? Who has submitted the most articles? Someone who recently left a ubf chapter mentioned something in a comment that intrigued…
- Critique My Resurrection Sermon (3)
April 21, 2014, 15:32
This past weekend, Hyde Park, Waterloo and West Loop UBF gathered for a combined Easter retreat in Michigan. It was fresh, spirited and joyful. It was planned,…
- A Guilt-free Easter in 2014 (12)
April 20, 2014, 22:21
It's been a while. But finally I experienced an Easter free of guilt, free of shame and free of exasperation. Such guilt-laden memories are fading fast from my…
- Holy Saturday
April 19, 2014, 07:19
This year, for the first time almost 30 years, I observed the Lent season. The Spirit made it clear in my heart what to abstain from: blogging. I love blogging…
- A Graphic Realization of Luke 22-24
April 16, 2014, 08:58
I recommend The Third Day especially for those who like comics. This small book of 48 colorful pages contains the Bible text of Luke 22-24 (in the Holman…
- Deja Vu, Self-Loathing, Resolve (54)
March 31, 2014, 23:31
Déjà vu came over me when I saw this public post on Facebook by a UBF chapter director: “In 2013, I received a lot of grace from God in serving 1:1 and…
- How I Met God (My Mystical Conversion)
March 26, 2014, 00:00
If God loves man, why does he command him not to eat the forbidden fruit? This is the story of my mystical conversion. In 1980 I left my homeland Malaysia and…
- 10 Traits of Creative People (3)
March 22, 2014, 19:34
When I saw this list on Facebook, I was surprised that it described me, though I never thought of myself as creative. Then I chucked to myself, thinking that…
- Christians Behaving Badly Toward Their Own Family (28)
March 21, 2014, 21:50
Recently, I spoke to a childhood friend who expressed to me just how hurt and disheartened he, his parents and his siblings were after his brother married and…
- The Happiest Compliment I Ever Received (2)
March 14, 2014, 21:18
I love my four kids. I love each of them. My sense of pride as their dad knows no limit. They are indeed God’s best gifts to me; they tangibly reveal the…
- How Did You Raise Your Kids as a Pastor (The ABCs of Godly Parenting) (9)
March 9, 2014, 22:56
Yesterday, a friend made a comment to me about Katy Perry and Jessica Simpson being PKs (pastor’s kids), who apparently no longer profess to be Christians.…
- Consider Both Sides When You Express Yourself (25)
March 7, 2014, 19:05
I asked a friend why some UBFers are upset with this post that I wrote: Sin is having an identity other than in God. He explained it to me so well in an…
- UBF’s Expectations or God’s? (5)
March 7, 2014, 01:52
Admin Note: This is a comment to Sin Is Having An Identity Other Than In God: "For 27 years my (Ben Toh's) identity was in my faithfulness to never miss a UBF…
- A Prayer for Ash Wednesday (1)
March 4, 2014, 19:57
Dear People of God: The first Christians observed with great devotion the days of our Lord's passion and resurrection, and it became for them the custom of…
- Going Silent for Lent (4)
March 4, 2014, 11:12
Tomorrow is Ash Wednesday, which for Roman Catholic and Protestant churches marks the beginning of the season of Lent. (The Eastern Orthodox observance of Lent…
- Sin Is Having An Identity Other Than In God (15)
March 4, 2014, 07:57
The sin beneath the sin. A Christian lies and says, “I did not slander you or gossip about you behind your back.” We conclude that the person sinned by…
- Why I Am Not a Christian (21)
March 2, 2014, 09:28
As the Lent season approaches this week, one question has surfaced in my mind: What does it mean to be a Christian? This is one of the thoughts I plan on…
- Book Review: The Year the World Ended (40)
February 27, 2014, 12:08
I have never been too fond of book reviews; they tend to be written by people you have never met, and they frequently come accompanied with the author’s…
- Change is coming (2)
February 26, 2014, 10:42
Change. Some people fear it. Some embrace it. Change happens, whether we like it or not. Sometimes things around us change the way we want. Other times we have…
- Captivated
February 21, 2014, 00:53
Look! Captivated: Beholding the Mystery of Jesus’ Death and Resurrection by Thabiti Anyabwile was a series of Easter sermons. Like the Bible that implores us…
- Shepherd Brian is Dead (81)
February 19, 2014, 08:17
Now that I’ve got your attention… I’d like to share the last puzzle piece of my recovery from my twenty-four years in University Bible Fellowship. This…
- Book Review: Freedom of Mind (16)
February 17, 2014, 12:59
This week I finished reading Steve Hassan's latest book, published in 2012, entitled "Freedom of Mind: Helping Loved Ones Leave Controlling People, Cults, and…
- Law and Grace, Moses and Paul (17)
February 15, 2014, 10:41
Is there a conflict between law and grace? Does Paul contradict Moses? Grace alone. Alternate perspectives and counter comments have previously been bantered…
- Critique My 6th Deuteronomy Sermon: One (4)
February 13, 2014, 22:28
Thanks so much Joe, Brian, Sharon, David, Chris, others for your liminal inducing comments on my sermons on Deuteronomy: Sin (chap. 1), Leadership (Dt 1:9-18),…
- Critique My Fifth Deuteronomy Sermon on Law (65)
February 7, 2014, 08:45
Your feedback on my first four sermons of Deuteronomy--Sin (Dt 4:1-46), Leadership (Dt 1:9-18), Faith (Dt 2:1-3:29), and Obedience (Dt 4:1-49)--compelled me…
- Book review: Eyes That See (13)
February 6, 2014, 15:09
As I continue on in the current ACT3 Network cohort class, I continue to be amazed at the beauty of God. One of the pivotal books for me has been James…
- Critique My Sermon on Wrath (119)
February 4, 2014, 08:15
GOD'S WRATH FLOWS FROM HIS LOVE (a sermon based loosely on Romans 1:18-32, delivered at Hyde Park on 9/22/13) The topic for today is wrath. More…
- American Evangelicalism: A Decadent Culture? (45)
February 3, 2014, 16:33
When you hear the phrase "decadent culture," what characteristics come to mind? Eroding morals? Licentiousness and fornication? Gluttony and drunkenness?…
- My Dilemma Between the Dichotomies (3)
February 3, 2014, 13:41
The saddest dichotomy that I have experienced in my 34 years of being a Christian (all in UBF) is between those who are strongly loyal UBF defenders and…
- Critique My Fourth Deuteronomy Sermon on… (52)
February 1, 2014, 07:11
...OBEDIENCE, a dreaded cringe-worthy word! In the 2011 NIV, the word “obey” occurs 206 times, and “obedience” 38 times. Daniel Block (OT scholar who…
- Critique My Matthew Sermon (16)
January 31, 2014, 14:24
Matthew 5:1-12 The Sermon on the Mount. The Magna Carta of Christianity. Matthew 5, 6 and 7. I call it the Sermon of Sermons, for a sermon is a declaration of…
- Critique My Ephesians Sermon (72)
January 28, 2014, 22:19
HE HIMSELF IS OUR PEACE Based on Ephesians 2:11-22 Paul’s letter to the Ephesians makes me feel like an ant. Here I am, walking around on the earth,…
- Aren’t We Christians All Jonahs? (22)
January 27, 2014, 19:26
My Jonah moment. I am reviewing Prophet on the Run for Cross Focused Reviews. It is a short, thorough and excellent practical commentary on Jonah by Baruch…
- Critique My Third Deuteronomy Sermon on Faith (85)
January 23, 2014, 20:00
Getting insightful and irenic feedback for my first two sermons in Deuternonmy (on Sin and Leadership) has been so much fun for me. Thanks! I learned a lot and…
- The Shepherding Movement and UBF (Part 2) (18)
January 21, 2014, 12:08
In my last article, I shared how Allen Clare introduced the Shepherding Movement of the 1970s and connected it to John Bevere’s 2001 book “Under Cover.”…
- The 100/0 Principle (11)
January 20, 2014, 07:18
"They were simply people whose experience taught them where true power lies." Malcolm Gladwell. I have very good news. One of my favorite authors, Malcolm…
- Critique my Leadership Practice and Sermon (63)
January 17, 2014, 17:46
This is a record third post in a day! After learning much from critiques of my sermon on Sin, here is my next sermon on Leadership (Dt 1:9-18) for this Sun. Do…
- Top 10 Things Not to Say to an Ex-UBFer (8)
January 17, 2014, 04:49
Sorry to post this the same day as your movie post Ben, but I'm a late-night TV sinner not a movie sinner like you :) I couldn't resist sharing this Top 10…
- 2014 Academy Award Predictions (3)
January 17, 2014, 01:10
This is for fun, since the 2014 Oscar nominations were announced today. But rest assured I am seriously engaged in the present discussions about The Shepherding…
- The Shepherding Movement and UBF (Part 1) (31)
January 15, 2014, 13:38
There is a book making rounds among many churches by John Bevere called “Under Cover: The Promise of Protection Under His Authority.” It’s been some time…
- God is Love (34)
January 13, 2014, 09:31
Our newest book is coming out in a month, entitled "The Year the World Ended." It is a love story and a story of my life in UBF for 29 years as a Bible…
- Critique My Deuteronomy Sermon (24)
January 9, 2014, 19:22
Please critique my sermon for this Sun (Jan 12, 2014) entitled Sin (Dt 1:1-46). Since I preach extemporaneously, I do not read my sermon but preach freely by…
- What if God loves Esau? (44)
January 8, 2014, 09:21
During my arranged marriage process, someone asked my wife, "Do you want to marry a man like Jacob or like Esau?" My wife said Jacob, of course. And so I was…
- Read the Bible - Trying and Doing (31)
January 6, 2014, 14:27
Do you read the Bible daily? I believe that all Christ followers know that we should read the Bible regularly, consistently and faithfully, if not daily. Do…
- Francis Chan's Anointed Sermon (28)
January 1, 2014, 15:06
Francis Chan preached in Kansas City at the One Thing 2013 IHOP conference on Dec 30, 2013. A friend who attended sent me the link to Chan's sermon. I was…
- How I Had Fun in 2013 (5)
December 31, 2013, 07:07
Is having fun a sin? For years I felt that having fun as a Christian was a sin. I felt bad watching movies and sports. So I took my Bible students with me to…
- Love God in 2014 (9)
December 30, 2013, 12:55
As 2013 comes to a close and 2014 approaches, a good thing UBF emphasizes is to write a review of the previous year and to choose a key verse for the New Year.…
- The Good Things I Saw Samuel Lee Do (12)
December 28, 2013, 09:53
A monster? If someone had never met Samuel Lee and all they knew about him they read on the Internet, then he is an egotistical megalomaniac and a cruel,…
- The B.I.T.E. Model (12)
December 24, 2013, 11:49
These days I love psychology-- the science of mind and behavior, the mental or behavioral characteristics of an individual or group, and the study of mind…
- How can smart people be controlled? (25)
December 21, 2013, 14:57
Ben's article about being mentally strong reminded me of Dr. Singer's work. Margaret Singer is the author of Cults in Our Midst. One of her contributions to…
- Are You Mentally Strong? (6)
December 19, 2013, 17:22
I love lists. I love this list of Mentally Strong People: 13 Things They Avoid. It reminds me of The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People--one of my…
- Junk Food from the Pulpit (8)
December 13, 2013, 17:32
In 1960, approximately 14% of adults in the United States could be classified as obese. By 2008, the prevalence of obesity had risen to one-third. Public-health…
- He/She is a Mental Patient (33)
December 12, 2013, 11:33
Tragic caricature. The labeling and caricature of anyone is never justifiable. It is certainly not loving nor is it Christ-like behavior. For decades I have…
- Having Fun (2)
December 8, 2013, 09:41
A key to having fun is to truly being yourself and living out who you are. When one is truly who they are, they live in the freedom and contentment and spirit…
- A Tribute to Nelson Mandela (6)
December 6, 2013, 11:49
Yesterday we lost a true visionary, leader and friend of humanity. Nelson Mandela was a man who spent much time in jail, and yet changed the world, especially…
- Amazon.com and the Gospel (9)
December 2, 2013, 11:37
Jeff Bezos founded Amazon.com in 1994. In two decades he has amassed a net worth of 28 billion. Watch his fascinating interview on 60 minutes yesterday…
- What I Am Most Thankful For (39)
November 27, 2013, 15:05
Grace (Eph 2:8-9; Tit 2:11). Love (Jer 31:3; Gal 2:20; 1 Jn 4:19). Election, i.e., being chosen (Jn 15:16) before the creation of the world (Eph 1:4), and…
- The Hunger Games Screams for Justice (9)
November 24, 2013, 10:45
When I asked, What is the central theme of your life, Brian answered and explained why his center is justice, which is a crucial center for God (Gen 18:25; Dt…
- What is the Central Theme of Your Life? (9)
November 22, 2013, 12:23
I am reading John Frame’s magnum opus--Systematic Theology: An Introduction to Christian Belief. It is 1,220 pages. I am surprised that I am enjoying reading…
- Yet Not I, But The Grace of God That Was With Me (34)
November 19, 2013, 13:09
1 Corinthians 15:10 “ But by the grace of God I am what I am, and his grace to me was not without effect. No, I worked harder than all of them—yet…
- Gravity: Discovering Life When Facing Death (3)
November 17, 2013, 12:16
Not to distract from bigbear’s important letter to Cincinnati UBF and to UBF at large and his first post (kudos!), my post provides some levity and counter-pr…
- A Letter to Cincinnati UBF (97)
November 17, 2013, 09:10
Dear Cincinnati UBF and all in UBF: It has been over a year and slowly God has revealed to me the truth about UBF and it's practices. UBF is abusive…
- What Happened in Toledo UBF - Part 3 (72)
November 14, 2013, 10:26
Recently I shared a two-part article about what was happening in Toledo UBF. In part 1, I shared how the Toledo UBF members tore down the old center building…
- Why I Attended Samuel Lee’s Memorial Service (35)
November 12, 2013, 12:35
Ronwad Thicke made this interesting comment about my attendance at Samuel Lee’s memorial service last month: “...most of you continue to engage in this…
- The Power of "And" (3)
November 10, 2013, 12:14
Word clouds are fascinating to me. For example, copy and paste some text into wordle.net and you'll be able to create a visual image of the most repeated words…
- Why Churches Stop Growing (5)
November 9, 2013, 11:50
I am reviewing a new book Innovation’s Dirty Little Secret by Larry Osborne for Cross Focused Reviews. Osborne is a senior pastor at North Coast Church, a…
- Like Button Updates
November 6, 2013, 13:26
During this downtime for our conversations here, I thought it would be interesting to highlight some things we can learn from our "like" buttons. As I…
- The Fear of “if” (3)
November 3, 2013, 11:34
If. It is a small word, just two letters. I like the word better in Russian, “если”. Or perhaps in French, “si” or German “wenn”. And even…
- Focus on the Less Honored (24)
October 31, 2013, 13:40
When the church becomes ugly. I often read a short daily commentary by Henri Nouwen. I find him insightful and inclusive, refreshing and renewing. An excerpt…
- Being Friends With Non-Christians (11)
October 25, 2013, 09:20
I have been in UBF my entire Christian life since I became a Christian in 1980. A seminal moment occurred about 10 years ago when Dr. John Armstrong preached a…
- A Happy UBF Chapter (16)
October 21, 2013, 09:16
12 UBF couples (10 from West Loop) renewed our marriage vows on Oct 12, 2013 after attending a series on marriage excellently led by Kevin and Julie Jesmer…
- How To Be A Team Member (5)
October 18, 2013, 00:44
How An Older Christian Can Be An Effective Member In An Intergenerational Mission Team “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just…
- More work equals more blessing? (22)
October 13, 2013, 18:58
In this article I’d like to discuss a clear ubf teaching that I heard very many times in my ubf chapter in Yekaterinburg. Brian provided us some space to…
- The Church I Want (14)
October 5, 2013, 15:20
So what kind of church do I want? Here is what I dream about, think about, ponder about, wish for, hope for and look out for. This is the kind of church I…
- Communication Confusion (58)
October 3, 2013, 11:35
How different is the East from the West in terms of communication? In my opinion, a significant problem in UBF is our suboptimal and often unhealthy way of…
- Extemporaneous Preaching (55)
September 30, 2013, 10:33
Consider preaching extemporaneously. For 30 years I preached by reading from a typed manuscript, perhaps like the way most UBFers deliver their Sun messages.…
- Is Psalm 119 a Love Poem About the Bible? (Part 2) (21)
September 27, 2013, 14:59
My job requires that I leave my home in Pennsylvania to spend part of each week in the Washington metropolitan area. While away from home, I miss my wife. We…
- Is Psalm 119 a Love Poem About the Bible? (Part 1) (14)
September 26, 2013, 09:07
Your word is a lamp for my feet, a light on my path (Ps 119:109). Psalm 119, the longest chapter in the Bible, has two prominent features. First, it is an…
- Announcement: Skype Talks (14)
September 21, 2013, 16:04
I expect and hope the UBF conversations here will continue (I know they will as long as Ben is publishing :). Although I will continue to comment from time…
- Sin Gathers; God Scatters (9)
September 20, 2013, 18:24
Building one’s own kingdom. The sin of every man---including Christians---is to build their own tower of Babel (Gen 11:4). They gather and centralize the…
- Dangerous Idols and Treasures of Church Leaders (7)
September 19, 2013, 12:26
My wife is reading Paul Tripp’s book “Dangerous Calling” and she is “calling me out” as she reads through the book and as she sees my blind spots…
- What Happened in Toledo UBF - Part 2 (124)
September 13, 2013, 02:57
So here it is. This is the sequel you've all been waiting for. It's nothing new however. There's no need to read this post. These words have already been…
- What Happened in Toledo UBF - Part 1 (123)
September 10, 2013, 10:31
In a recent comment Vitaly asked numerous valid questions about what was going on in Toledo UBF. It will indeed take many years for the ministry there to…
- Midweek Question: Message Do's and Don'ts (79)
September 5, 2013, 14:29
A lively discussion has begun on this website over whether it is constructive to post reviews and ratings of specific messages delivered at UBF Sunday worship…
- Where's the Hope? (41)
August 31, 2013, 18:59
In a recent comment, Joe asked me "What is springboarding?". And Ben challenged all of us to think about "How to improve our UBF messages". Because I feel that…
- I'll Stand (42)
August 31, 2013, 08:33
You stood before creation. Eternity within Your hand. You spoke the earth into motion. My soul now to stand. "The Stand" by Hillsong United You…
- How UBFriends Started: What You Don't Know (39)
August 29, 2013, 16:45
IMHO UBFriends gets a pretty bad rep from UBF. Discussions among some leaders invariably involve shutting down UBFriends or controlling it. It is also almost…
- My Letter (15)
August 28, 2013, 13:12
As I conitnue my journey of recovery from over two decades as a UBF leader, I sometimes go back and read what I said or wrote in the past. I came across a…
- Forgiveness: Loyalty, Love and Life (144)
August 26, 2013, 22:52
Recently I was inspired by the discussion about David’s lament and praise of Saul. I really appreciated Terry’s input to try to stimulate discussion. I…
- UBF in Crisis (23)
August 25, 2013, 08:50
Joe's last article has brought me an unexpected amount of resolution and healing on my journey of recovery from University Bible Fellowship. If a senior…
- UBF at the Crossroads (213)
August 21, 2013, 21:00
UBF is in a crisis. Many will disagree with me. "Stop exaggerating," they'll say. "Don't worry, have faith! Focus on the positive. Remember what God has…
- Let's Reform UBF (32)
August 20, 2013, 18:19
After reading Joe's article about CMI and some private conversations, I am compelled to share and document the following declaration of reform. This declaration…
- Praise God Who Blessed the 2013 ISBC! (52)
August 19, 2013, 13:08
“Praise God who blessed the 2013 International Summer Bible Conference August 1st thru 4th…” Thus beginneth the first sentence of the official report…
- Married For 32 Years (8)
August 18, 2013, 10:29
This past week my wife Christy and I celebrated our 32nd wedding anniversary. Our older UBF missionaries have been married much longer than we have. But I…
- Yoked for life? (30)
August 17, 2013, 10:56
A personal, life-long shepherd. Do you want one? In 1987 I happened by chance to meet ubf shepherds on my campus during my third week of college. I was 18…
- My Journey of Recovery (14)
August 15, 2013, 22:59
Ever feel like you are carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders? Ever feel crushed and suffocated by the weight of your burdens? As a member of ubf,…
- A Wonderful UBF Conference, But... (19)
August 14, 2013, 00:11
Overall it was a wonderful conference. I went there eager to hear systematic and textual messages. I came to hear upfront calls to be missionaries. Jesus’…
- My Offer (13)
August 13, 2013, 12:35
After attending the Global Leadership Summit last week, I was inspired to offer something to ubf directors. Perhaps we could forge a new relationship because…
- UBF Needs Troublemakers (111)
August 12, 2013, 08:16
Please cause trouble! A friend sent me this link and I thanked him for paying me the highest compliment: Make Trouble, My Friends. It is a commentary of what…
- The Upside Down Kingdom (4)
August 11, 2013, 15:01
One of the points in Chris Brown's sermon at the 2013 WCA Global Leadership Summit was about Jesus turning leadership upside down. Here is a different sermon…
- What I Experienced at the 2013 WCA GLS (13)
August 10, 2013, 09:13
Each year since 1995, Willow Creek Association in Chicago has hosted a two day leadership conference called the Global Leadership Summit. In 2013, that summit…
- How To Improve Our UBF Messages (49)
August 9, 2013, 09:21
Critiquing our UBF messages (sermons) at the 2013 ISBC is NOT an indictment against the messengers. To say that a message sounds like the “same old same…
- Levity From A Friend: Love Your Husband (3)
August 8, 2013, 11:45
Maybe some of you had heard this before. I had not and found myself laughing. After a friend emailed me this, I thought I'd post it to "lighten the mood"…
- The Woolly Mammoth in the Room (11)
August 7, 2013, 18:15
As I read through Ben's reflections on the 2013 ubf ISBC and the comments that followed, I was encouarged to see honest sharing. That tells me the gospel…
- Post 2013 ISBC Reflections (102)
August 5, 2013, 11:01
Do share your experiences and reflections from the 2013 ISBC. Share the good the bad and the ugly. When we share only the good (as on UBF websites), it is…
- ISBC UBFriends Stats (8)
August 3, 2013, 22:19
I found the following statistics to be kind of exciting. For August 1st to August 3rd, the most number of visits from a city to ubfriends.org is…
- What would the other guy say? (21)
August 3, 2013, 10:30
This week I heard a fantastic logic puzzler called "The Two Doors Puzzle". After hearing the answer to the puzzle, I immediately recognized the principle…
- UBF Doctrine - Behavioral Slogans (19)
August 1, 2013, 09:33
How then shall we live? I heard that famous question many times in ubf. In fact, the first 7 ideological points of the ubf heritage were often quickly taught…
- Two Kinds of Shepherding (6)
July 30, 2013, 14:48
This might be a redundant article in that I had recently written related articles: guidelines for best shepherding practice, how the Apostle Paul "feeds…
- New Life – The Growing Family (30)
July 29, 2013, 09:22
Editorial note: Our friend "gc" has been offline for awhile, taking care of his growing family. Congratulations on your new child! Here are some thoughts…
- UBF Doctrine - Ideological Slogans (13)
July 27, 2013, 13:16
Just to re-cap, next up on my systematic review is point 8 of the 12 point ubf heritage. This "house church" point begins a new section, which I call "behaviora…
- Is Raising Disciples the Main Purpose of the Church? (16)
July 26, 2013, 08:38
Editorial Comment: This was sent as a private email. But since it asks and addresses a fundamental and pertinent issue, I suggested that this be posted for…
- 12 Things UBF Taught Me (7) (4)
July 24, 2013, 14:28
"Lay Missionaries" - This is also known as "tentmaker missionaries" or "self-supporting missionaries". The idea is that a missionary does not need to be…
- 12 Things UBF Taught Me (6) (40)
July 23, 2013, 15:01
"Spiritual order" - This heritage point is one of the most vague, and perhaps the most misunderstood and misused. I was taught two meanings of this point, and…
- 12 Things UBF Taught Me (5) (5)
July 22, 2013, 11:38
"A spirit of giving" - This means to support youself. Be independent. Don't look to other people for help. Don't have a beggar mentality. Give, even when you…
- Admin Note: Like Buttons! (12)
July 20, 2013, 11:18
Ok so I played around with various "like" and "dislike" buttons, per some requests. This has come up from time to time, so I found a rather flexible solution.…
- The Gospel of Christ Vs. The Gospel of Mission (24)
July 18, 2013, 16:11
During my ten years of Bible study in UBF, I was taught many wonderful truths. Some of those truths led me into a personal relationship with my Lord Jesus,…
- Sophomoric Musings: My Dream (29)
July 16, 2013, 14:36
This is the first article in a series I've entitled “Sophomoric Musings”. I view my musings as sophomoric for two reasons. The first is that the word…
- Emotionally Healthy Spirituality, Part Two (49)
July 15, 2013, 18:15
I want to share with you the book report part two, Peter Scazzero's book. Here I concentrated two parts; first the symptoms of emotionally unhealthy spiritualit…
- 12 Things UBF Taught Me (4) (12)
July 14, 2013, 10:01
"Manger spirit" - The manger is perhaps the most recognizable Christian symbol, next to the cross. ubf taught me "manger spirit" and gave a whole new meaning…
- 12 Things UBF Taught Me (3) (17)
July 13, 2013, 07:50
"Campus Evangelism" - The third point in the ubf heritage is about college campus ministry. I normally combined "World Mission" and "Campus Evangelism" in to…
- 12 Things UBF Taught Me (2) (11)
July 11, 2013, 21:55
"Do world mission" - The second point in the ubf heritage is World Mission. I learned that World Mission is something you do. The idea is that people in the…
- I'm Done...Writing Testimonies (31)
July 9, 2013, 10:42
In 2007, 27 years after being in UBF, I woke up one morning and said to myself, “I’m done writing testimonies for the rest of my blessed Christian life in…
- 12 Things UBF Taught Me (1) (20)
July 8, 2013, 19:01
"Go back to the bible" - The first and most obvious thing ubf taught me was to read the bible. I wasn't taught to study the bible as in seminary school. It was…
- UBF Doctrine - Introduction (55)
July 5, 2013, 16:00
What does ubf believe? What are their doctrines? The answers to these questions have been ellusive at best for over 50 years. Some people point to ubf's…
- Happy Independence Day! (3)
July 4, 2013, 07:25
I am an American. I am born free. Jesus' gospel is the gospel of freedom. No more re-defining "freedom" for me! Freedom means you are free. Fast, on a…
- A Korean Critic (17)
July 2, 2013, 12:46
Critical thinking. Can a Korean do it? Could a Korean display the healthy attributes of a critic? After spending tens of thousands of hours with Koreans in ubf…
- If UBF Would Listen... (43)
July 1, 2013, 15:07
Over the past few weeks there has been more than usual comments and articles that I, who love to read your stuff, can’t keep up! The cynical part of me…
- A Case of Mistaken Identity (11)
June 30, 2013, 10:59
Recent memory for popular culture saw a resurgence of Hugo’s Les Misérables as the 2012 film after the musical caught everyone’s attention. Javert, a…
- Puppets On A String (43)
June 29, 2013, 17:43
A friend of mine brought the following list to my attention this week. I feel compelled to share this as an informative article in hopes that people might…
- Does UBF Apotheosize Her Leaders? (29)
June 27, 2013, 17:57
I love asking questions, especially highly provocative ones (with a difficult word)! “Apotheosize” means “to exalt, glorify, deify, elevate to the rank…
- Don't Forget God's Grace (27)
June 26, 2013, 12:22
With the upcoming Summer Bible Conference fast approaching, the labor of many chapters is to bring home the message, "So Loved". The theme is to serve the…
- The Only Necessary Thing (127)
June 25, 2013, 12:34
Forgiveness is such an important subject and one of the main teachings of Jesus. Jesus taught his disciples to forgive those who wronged to them seventy times…
- How My Life Changed Forever (24)
June 23, 2013, 20:37
Often times when someone has something important, someone close to them they are pushed to let go. We learn that it is our Isaac. This is a point that is…
- Confronting Error: Condemnation or Conversation? (100)
June 21, 2013, 13:06
Luke 20:46-47 says “Beware of the scribes, which desire to walk in long robes, and love greetings in the markets, and the highest seats in the synagogues,…
- Traits UBF Leaders Do Not Like (24)
June 20, 2013, 11:36
UBF leaders clearly do not like those they regard as rebellious, stubborn, proud, self-directed members who do not listen to them, obey them, wait on them, or…
- Godly Sorrow - Part 3 (25)
June 19, 2013, 19:34
Here is the conclusion of Spurgeon's sermon on godly sorrow that leads to repentance. "Lord, let me weep for nought but sin, And after none but thee; And then…
- Changes or Just Illusions? (22)
June 17, 2013, 06:28
I want to suggest all UBFers to consider this piece from an article Control Mechanisms in the ICC and to answer the question: Are changes in UBF real or they…
- Godly Sorrow - Part 2 (2)
June 16, 2013, 12:36
"I am going to preach tonight about sorrow for sin. I hope it has not yet quite gone out of the world; I trust that sorrowful penitence does still exist,…
- LeBron James Takes Responsibility (35)
June 13, 2013, 13:43
In Game 3 of the NBA Finals (6/11/13), San Antonio beat Miami by 36 points, which is the third worst loss in NBA Finals history. After such a humiliating…
- What if UBF Had Used The NASB? (51)
June 12, 2013, 12:38
Think fast: what is the #1 most popular Bible verse in UBF? I think that those who have studied the Bible in UBF, who have attended UBF wedding ceremonies,…
- Jesus is Lord (60)
June 11, 2013, 03:34
When Christians preach the gospel of Jesus they say to their converts that “Jesus is our Savior and Lord”. We all discuss UBF here and we all know what UBF…
- Godly Sorrow - Part 1 (15)
June 8, 2013, 06:36
Recently I discovered a gem of Christian sermons. It is Spurgeon's sermon "Godly Sorrow and Sorrow". I am compelled to share this today as I am convinced this…
- The Good, the Bad and the Ugly of UBF (41)
June 5, 2013, 13:53
The good. UBF has many good godly Christians. UBF people are also generally very sincere. This may be a reason why many have come to Christ through UBF people,…
- Do We Need a Counselor? (68)
June 2, 2013, 08:51
After leaving UBF ministry in 2011, one of the first things I noticed was that numerous former members (and some current members too) were going to see…
- Wesley's Reflection on Authority and Authoritarianism (153)
May 31, 2013, 00:01
(Editorial Comment: This is Wesley's detailed and lively unedited response to Ben's sermon on "Shepherding Sheep" last Sun, May 26, 2013, at West Loop.) Ben,…
- The Minimum Barrel (33)
May 30, 2013, 12:59
One of the topics that keeps surfacing here on this blog is spiritual abuse. This is a topic that has garnered growing attention in recent years among American…
- Book: Emotionally Healthy Spirituality (246)
May 27, 2013, 08:04
I would like to share with you about Peter Scazzero’s book, “Emotionally Healthy Spirituality”. Often times seemingly good Christians can have…
- Why the Shepherding Movement Failed (73)
May 24, 2013, 12:46
Have you heard of the Shepherding Movement? It was a phenomena that occurred in America mainly in the 1970's. The Shepherding Movement, which had roots in the…
- Are UBF Chapter Directors/Missionaries Accountable? (59)
May 23, 2013, 12:41
When deemed necessary, can they be questioned, challenged, corrected, or rebuked? In 2013, the current UBF General Director, changed parts of his New Year’s…
- My Concerns About The International Conference, part 2 (54)
May 21, 2013, 19:16
Earlier Ben shared an article expressing his concerns for the upcoming UBF ISBC (International Summer Bible Conference) to be held in Pennsylvania. The article…
- Because God "Blessed" UBF, UBF is OK (33)
May 21, 2013, 10:03
Over the years I have heard this expressed by some UBF leaders: "Since God 'blessed' UBF, then UBF must be OK. For if God was not pleased with UBF, God would…
- Why John 17 is About the Mission of Jesus (30)
May 19, 2013, 07:39
My good friend Ben recently posted an article where he shared his concerns about the upcoming ubf summer bible conference (ISBC). Ben has become a friend who…
- Hello Malaysia, Ukraine and South Korea! (15)
May 18, 2013, 07:37
From time to time, as the technical admin here, I review our website statistics from Google Analytics. We may wonder who is reading this stuff. According to…
- Brian Karcher is Bitter (38)
May 17, 2013, 10:56
Why is Brian Karcher so bitter? How could Ben and Joe forget God's grace and start bashing UBF so shamelessly on a public website? Why can't Chris and Vitaly…
- My Concerns About The International Conference (363)
May 15, 2013, 22:17
(My original title was “Why I Won’t Attend the International Conference.” But I was persuaded to change it to a “less hostile” title.) Let me state…
- Not So With You (12)
May 12, 2013, 09:18
Recently I shared the conclusion of the study group my wife and I attended for about nine months. Today I am sharing about the beginning of the Emerging…
- The Freedom of Self-Forgetfulness, Part two (89)
May 11, 2013, 08:08
This is part two of Keller’s book “The Freedom of Self-Forgetfulness” report. Freedom is so precious like diamond. It cannot be easily obtained. It…
- John Armstrong on Knowing When to Stop (27)
May 9, 2013, 08:15
As I read Brian's last article, "It Must Come to an End," I thought about the importance of knowing when to stop. How many organizational leaders have…
- It Must Come to an End (34)
May 8, 2013, 06:09
It must come to an end. If it doesn't end, it won't be healthy for any of us. That was the advice one of our pastors gave to a member of our cohort group as we…
- Why Are UBF Missionaries Tired? (95)
May 6, 2013, 14:40
At every major UBF conference one prayer topic is invariably to encourage tired, burdened, burnt out and discouraged missionaries. “This conference is for…
- Telling The Truth (How West Loop UBF Began) (58)
May 3, 2013, 21:36
As Joe is telling it to the church (I am lovin’ it with high fives!), I wish to tell the truth as a parallel post. UBF leaders like to say among themselves…
- Telling it to the Church, Part 2 (79)
May 3, 2013, 09:46
In the discussion following my last article, a reader who goes by the name "vmi" asked a good question. I just want to ask Joe if you have tried the…
- Telling it to the Church (201)
April 29, 2013, 11:28
One of the most explicit New Testament passages on how to handle issues of sin within the church is Matthew 18:15-17: "If your brother or sister sins, go…
- Guidelines for Best Shepherding Practice (54)
April 28, 2013, 16:01
A friend asked me (paraphrasing his question), “How may UBF communicate the best practice of shepherding?” This is my short reply. When "shepherding…
- Is UBF Scared of Grace? (161)
April 24, 2013, 20:42
Is authoritarianism the reason people leave UBF? A repeatedly expressed sentiment is that authoritarianism causes so many to leave UBF even after decades of…
- Christian Life is More than Sin Management (12)
April 23, 2013, 11:42
I entered UBF when I was seventeen years old. I had just finished a disastrous break-up with a high school girlfriend that had left me with overwhelming guilt…
- In Christ Alone I Stand (2)
April 21, 2013, 14:13
At the last supper, the disciples disputed about who was greatest, but Jesus taught them the spiritual way: Luke 22:25-26 Jesus said to them, "The kings of…
- Marriage--Breaking An Engagement (79)
April 19, 2013, 05:34
I just “love” to talk about marriage, especially with singles. Teasing singles about their marriage with levity is just so much fun and cute. I have…
- Saying "I'm Sorry" (12)
April 16, 2013, 22:47
After losing one million USD to a conman in 2004, I said to my wife, “I’m sorry.” Perhaps, I never felt worse in my life because I knew how much I had…
- Radio Silence (18)
April 14, 2013, 22:06
There is a communication term called "radio silence". This term refers to a "status in which all fixed or mobile radio stations in an area are asked to stop…
- The Freedom of Self-Forgetfulness (119)
April 14, 2013, 07:58
I would like to share with you about a book written by Timothy Keller. He talks about three parts; The natural condition of the human ego, the transformed view…
- The 10 Commandments of UBF (24)
April 13, 2013, 04:40
I am the LORD your God who delivered you from human systems that keep you in bondage to slavery (cf. Ex 20:2; Deut 5:6). You shall not put your church…
- Truths Learned In and Out of UBF (12)
April 12, 2013, 12:47
I joined UBF in September, 2002 when I was seventeen years old. After serving the Lord for nearly 10 years, God led me to say farewell in August, 2012. God has…
- Finding the Key to Real Transformation (5)
April 11, 2013, 09:14
While the UBF conversations continue here, we would like to begin some new dialogues about Christianity in general. We have a few articles that have been…
- Issues UBF “Ignores” (are not ignored on UBFriends) (26)
April 11, 2013, 05:36
Commenting on the “Most Commented.” Scroll down the right side of this page. The last section is titled “Most Commented.” It is interesting to note…
- What I Feel Right Now (70)
April 8, 2013, 09:27
A few days ago, Wesley posted this comment which was addressed to Brian. Brian, I apologize I haven’t read all your postings here. Help me out. What do…
- Son of Rick Warren Commits Suicide (18)
April 6, 2013, 19:02
Reading this news shocked me. The youngest son of Rick Warren, Matthew, aged 27, has committed suicide after a life long battle with mental illness, depression…
- I Have This Against You (2)
April 6, 2013, 18:28
Scary words of Jesus. These are harsh, critical and condemning words of Jesus to the church at Thyatira (Rev 2:20). To the church at Ephesus and Pergamun,…
- Prayers for the Church (6)
April 4, 2013, 23:13
I sense that the Bride of Christ needs us to pray for her now. Here are some excerpts from The Book of Common Prayer. Will you agree with me on these in…
- I Dream of Absolute Honesty (162)
April 1, 2013, 20:17
We often dream things we never think of while we are awake. Joseph’s two dreams concerned a thing he would have never thought of or imagined. Dream has…
- Good Leaders Lead Without Lording Over Others (2)
March 31, 2013, 18:34
No growth = Deficiency of leadership. Good leadership is a major key to any healthy growing organization or church. If a church is not growing you can almost…
- Good Leaders Judge Fairly Without Partiality (3)
March 28, 2013, 20:01
Why able and capable young leader’s leave. In good leaders delegate without control, I explained why Moses was a wise and effective leader, while many…
- Good Leaders Delegate Without Control (18)
March 25, 2013, 19:25
A key to successful leadership is delegation. Last Sun in Manila, I preached on The Words Moses Spoke (Deut 1:1-46) in my gradual attempt to grasp “the…
- The Sins of Older Christians (3)
March 21, 2013, 21:14
As an “older” Christian, it is so easy for me to rant and rave about the sins of “younger” Christians and non-Christians: lust and laziness, impropriety…
- How Does UBF Teach Sanctification? (13)
March 18, 2013, 21:01
Does UBF teach an effort driven sanctification? Do correct me on this, but based on what I have heard for over three decades, UBF teaches this: “While…
- What do followers want? (6)
March 17, 2013, 14:51
Leadership. That's a word I've heard a lot about the past 25 years. We Christians talk an awful lot about leadership: Who is a leader? Who is allowed to be a…
- Is There Glory and Honor in Reconciliation? (19)
March 14, 2013, 20:53
Reconciliation is the “hardest” job of Christians. The “easier” job is to invite new people to Bible study. A friend said, “It's better for UBF to…
- How Does Shepherd Paul "Feed Sheep"? (36)
March 6, 2013, 13:10
How does the apostle Paul shepherd God’s flock? To emphasize mission and Bible teaching, UBF has loved Paul’s imperatives from 2 Timothy: Endure hardship…
- When Silence Speaks Volumes (8)
March 4, 2013, 11:23
It's no secret that UBFriends has become a gathering place for some who have strongly negative opinions and experiences of the UBF organization. It is a very…
- Bible Study: Is More Always Better? (60)
February 26, 2013, 18:41
In the weeks before Samuel Lee unexpectedly passed away, the advice that he gave was, "Go back to the Bible." That saying, “Go back to the Bible,” fe…
- On the Ministry of Reconciliation (22)
February 25, 2013, 11:03
Yesterday, a friend called my attention to an article titled, An Open Letter to the Church: How to Love the Cynics. The author, Addie Zierman, writes from the…
- What Are Friends For? (18)
February 20, 2013, 10:25
"As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another" (Pr 27:17). At a recent breakfast with a group of Christian men, one person offered this verse as an…
- On Lent and Fasting (12)
February 19, 2013, 10:10
Lent is universally observed in the Roman Catholic, Eastern Orthodox, and the so-called high church Protestant traditions. In recent years, many low church…
- "Forgiving Myself" by Joshua (5)
February 15, 2013, 16:21
Joshua’s recent comment moved me to tears. His words, phrases, comments and articulation strike at the core and at the root of the matter regarding “shepher…
- A Lenten Prayer (13)
February 13, 2013, 09:30
Today is Ash Wednesday and the first day of Lent, the traditional forty-day period of preparation for Holy Week and Easter, a season for fasting and repentance.…
- My "Worst" Infuriation (188)
February 9, 2013, 12:05
I had previously shared about my "worst" sin and my "worst" humiliation. In keeping with my predisposition toward making sweeping generalizations and extreme…
- A Letter to Bibleman (28)
February 1, 2013, 12:08
Not long ago, we received the following message from a curious reader. Dear Bibleman, I was wondering if someone can write an article on UBFriends…
- The Satisfaction of Justice (Django Unchained) (6)
January 30, 2013, 11:29
This is a reflection of Django Unchained. It has uncountable racial slurs and is ultra violent, typical of a Tarantino movie. It is not recommended for kids…
- If Not For UBF I Would Not Be Married (292)
January 23, 2013, 20:04
What I am sharing in this post is my happiest story. I have shared it uncountable times over the last 30 years ever since I “married by faith” in Chicago…
- What are we talking about? (23)
January 23, 2013, 11:16
Three years ago we started this blog in hopes that it would become more than a blog-- perhaps we could become an influence and an online community which would…
- Why Are Christians, Jews, Muslims, Buddhists and UBF Members So… (34)
January 23, 2013, 09:01
A clever analysis of religious groups has been circulating on the internet. I first saw it in this article by Christian author Frank Viola, but it has been…
- Slavery, Harps and Fig Newtons (51)
January 17, 2013, 21:54
Last year during a blogging discussion with various people, I had someone tell me: "The bible says it, and so I believe it. End of story." Such an attitude…
- Cognitive Dissonance, Jehovah's Witnesses and Me (18)
January 12, 2013, 08:46
Recently, some interesting discussion began on this website about the concept from social psychology known as cognitive dissonance. The Merriam-Webster online…
- Pay No Attention To That Man Behind the Curtain! (7)
January 10, 2013, 11:22
In the book Ethnography as a Pastoral Practice, author Mary Clark Moschella hones in on some painful truths about pastors. Religious leaders are often…
- My "Worst" Humiliation (43)
January 10, 2013, 10:55
Humiliation is very difficult to talk about. Perhaps, some ex-UBFers who share “abuses” that they experienced in UBF, arose from feeling humiliated by…
- Listeners Are Born, Then Unmade (9)
January 7, 2013, 17:10
Warning: This article may cause psychological pain by revealing that you are not a good listener. If you can’t handle the truth, stop reading, cover your…
- Why People Leave UBF, Part 2 (14)
January 6, 2013, 11:49
We cannot agree as to what the solution to a problem is unless we agree as to what the nature of the problem is. People leaving UBF is a problem. Often (and…
- 12 Random Reflections for the New Year (18)
January 1, 2013, 10:35
12 random reflections that I will likely forget during the year 2013: Reflect daily on the whole counsel/will/plan/purpose of God (Acts 20:27). Give my…
- Should UBF Adjust/Modify The Way Joseph Is Taught? (13)
December 30, 2012, 11:51
A verse every Christian experiences. Christians love the story of Joseph in Genesis. In the big picture, it proclaims the marvelous and majestic sovereignty of…
- One Reason People Leave UBF (94)
December 28, 2012, 11:59
In a recent comment, Joshua sums up his (decade plus) experience in UBF here. He says that his wife and he “were told specifically how we ought to obey…
- How Should UBF Respond to Criticism? (18)
December 26, 2012, 10:21
How has UBF handled criticism? Perhaps not very well? Do we embrace and listen to what our critics say? My friend Brian Karcher is a critic of UBF (where he…
- What Can UBF Do? (42)
December 18, 2012, 18:06
Comments heard are that UBFriends states ad nauseum all the wrongs of UBF without stating what can be done. Perhaps so. But I believe that some good and some…
- Organizational Health and the Church (38)
December 15, 2012, 11:42
"The single, greatest advantage any company can achieve is organizational health. Yet it is ignored by most leaders even though it is simple, free, and…
- Keep Spiritual Order (28)
December 13, 2012, 15:14
My thesis is that spiritual "order" is equality as in the Trinity, not hierarchy. Where hierarchy prevails, it butchers the Trinity, and makes Christianity…
- How You Glorify Yourself (8)
December 12, 2012, 12:18
This could just as easily be titled, “How I glorify myself.” Why do we do this? It is part and parcel of our fallen humanity. It really does not matter how…
- What is shepherding? (37)
December 6, 2012, 10:59
At the heart of the UBF lifestyle is something called 1:1. This is pronounced "one-to-one" and it refers to the role of shepherding other people (specifically…
- Lincoln, Life of Pi (25)
November 30, 2012, 12:29
Both movies will be nominated for multiple major categories during the Golden Globes and Academy Awards season. Though both movies are over two hours long,…
- Go Ahead. Make My Day (12)
November 23, 2012, 14:03
Dirty Harry’s classic line “Go ahead. Make my day” is one of the best Hollywood movie lines ever. Check out the super cool extended 4 min clip, or the…
- Abraham Lincoln's Thanksgiving Proclamation (4)
November 21, 2012, 14:19
This is the (abridged) Proclamation of Thanksgiving by Abraham Lincoln on Oct 3, 1863: “The year that is drawing towards its close, has been filled with…
- Believing Grace, Practicing Law (11)
November 19, 2012, 09:38
Saved by Grace; Function by Law. I know that I am saved by Grace (Eph 2:8-9), but somehow I functionally and practically operate as if I am saved by keeping…
- What 2nd Gens Need From Their Dad (57)
November 14, 2012, 21:28
Barnabas Piper, son of John Piper, wrote about 7 Things a Pastor's Kid Needs from a Father. I sent it to my four kids and asked them how I measured up (or did…
- Sexual Temptation (8)
November 8, 2012, 11:52
You always notice someone in church, or in class, or at work, but you will never tell anyone. How do we Christians overcome the ever present temptation to lust…
- Competing Glories (in UBF) (8)
October 31, 2012, 11:12
7 competing glories. Do we think that we truly and purely live for the glory of God alone (1 Cor 10:31)? Because we are already “mature, seasoned”…
- The Strength of UBF: Doggedness (25)
October 28, 2012, 11:11
UBF bashing? Some say that UBFriends promotes UBF bashing. Perhaps, there is a fine line between being transparent with full disclosure, and being discreet and…
- Do You Link Your Shepherding With Your Salvation? (2)
October 23, 2012, 16:15
What is the real source of your happiness? We Christians are rightfully so happy when someone accepts Christ through our shepherding and Bible teaching. I love…
- Are UBF Shepherds Unobtrusive? (53)
October 12, 2012, 10:41
What does “unobtrusive” mean? Last week when I was praying with a friend who is a UBF leader, I prayed for him to be unobtrusive. The word “unobtrusive”…
- How do Christians relate to culture? (10)
October 1, 2012, 13:31
In Jesus' final great prayer, he prayed for his followers to not be taken out of the world and at the same time remember that they are not "of the world" (John…
- What is the gospel? (124)
September 22, 2012, 18:30
For over two decades I thought I knew the gospel. I believed the gospel, preached the gospel, taught the gospel and shared the gospel. But it occurred to me…
- Are UBF Leaders Cult Leaders? (250)
September 10, 2012, 05:40
Question. Brian asked a legitimate question on a previous post Spiritual Bullying: "Does Mr. Ludy explain what many senior UBF leaders have been doing for 50…
- Philippines UBF: Richness in Poverty (2)
September 8, 2012, 08:29
“Blessed are you who are poor, for yours is the kingdom of God” (Lk 6:20). Check out this 12 min video picture montage of my 6 week stay in Philippines…
- A Story That Speaks to Life (8)
August 30, 2012, 20:57
Perhaps because I love cats, this story touched me at a deep level. In 1947, the pride of London zoo was a beautiful white polar bear. It’s mother was dead…
- My Original Intent... (16)
August 27, 2012, 21:24
My post--Samuel Lee was not overbearing--“happened” as I was intending to write about authoritarian Christian leadership (again!): “NOT lording it over…
- Samuel Lee Was Not Overbearing (19)
August 24, 2012, 00:29
Samuel Lee was Meek (and Authoritarian). Those who read this blog know I have a very positive sentiment toward Samuel Lee, our UBF founder. I freely acknowledge…
- Ben-2012 to Ben Toh-1998 (13)
August 19, 2012, 22:53
A friend described me as “scientific and analytical.” I accepted her assessment. I realize (from my wife) that it is a pain to be scientifically and…
- Have You Lost Your Freedom? (5)
August 15, 2012, 18:32
Are you truly free as a Christian? The unique distinctive of Christianity among all the world’s religions is freedom (Gen 2:16; Jn 8:32; Gal 5:1; 2 Cor…
- Psalms in the Key of Life (2)
August 12, 2012, 10:07
The book of Psalms has played a vital role in Jewish and Christian spirituality. Dietrich Bonhoeffer called it “the prayer book of Jesus Christ.” Jews at…
- The Fallibility of Paul (28)
August 6, 2012, 15:30
Lately I’ve been spending a lot of time thinking about how to approach Scripture. When I was discipled in my present church, I was taught a very specific…
- A Real Testimony by Ben Toh-1998 (10)
August 5, 2012, 08:00
I found an old diary I left in Manila, Philippines, at the UBF chapter where I am staying. In it, I wrote on Easter Sun, Apr 12, 1998 a testimony I had…
- Let Local Leaders Lead (17)
July 31, 2012, 22:53
In Manila, I am witnessing a vibrant work of the Holy Spirit in Philippines UBF, which I have not experienced in 32 years as a Christian in UBF USA. John…
- Revival Begins With Oneself (3)
July 26, 2012, 01:00
We Christians want a revival in our own ministries, churches, nation and world. But no revival happens corporately before it happens individually. No revival…
- My Letter to Joe-2005 (46)
July 23, 2012, 17:13
Dear Joe-2005, This is my response to your report "How to Read and Study the Bible" which you gave at our 2005 summer conference. Please accept this as…
- What a First Day in Philippines UBF (7)
July 22, 2012, 17:38
For 8 years, I visited Philippines UBF yearly. It has been an indigenous UBF ministry led from the outset by Filipinos for the last 25 years. I have felt the…
- A Roadmap for Peace (9)
July 20, 2012, 12:47
Recently I finished reading the book "Once An Arafat Man" by Tass Saada. I found his true-life story to be immensely helpful, hopeful and inspiring. I would…
- An Imaginary Report by Joe-2005 (62)
July 16, 2012, 15:34
No one can approach the Bible without bias. Our understanding of Scripture is shaped by our culture and traditions, personality, history, relationships and…
- How Well Are You Discipling Others? (87)
July 13, 2012, 07:45
This is based on a fascinating 9 min video by Father Robert Barron about how he would teach his seminary students as the new President of Mundalein Seminary,…
- The BCD of Teaching the Bible (6)
June 30, 2012, 16:43
While preaching through Titus, I came up with the BCD of Bible teaching and preaching. Each letter stands for 2 words which should always go together when we…
- Pastor's Code of Ethics (18)
June 29, 2012, 11:56
How should pastors, elders, shepherds, and church leaders behave? Do pastors need a code of ethics? Code of Ethics for Pastors (CEP). Over 18 months,…
- Marriage By Faith (Should "No Dating" be a Church Policy?) (124)
June 20, 2012, 17:39
At some point in our one-to-one Bible study with our Bible student, we might encourage them not to date so as not to fall into sexual temptation. If they still…
- LGBT, Marriage, and Singleness (39)
June 17, 2012, 20:47
I will start with Richard B. Hays' take on the LGBT issue. He is a United Methodist, New Testament scholar and currently the Dean of Duke Divinity School. He…
- What Kind of Leader Are You? (11)
June 15, 2012, 09:08
UBF loves to raise leaders. I love to raise leaders. Do you love to raise leaders? We show our love for raising leaders by using phrases like “discipleship…
- Mission/Legalism/Tradition Hinders Spiritual Growth (10)
June 12, 2012, 19:10
Welcome back from a break. Thank you, admin, for your labor in the Lord! Emphasizing mission. Since 1961, UBF’s strength has been our emphasis on mission.…
- UBFriends Admin Notice (6)
June 1, 2012, 16:29
The admin team here at UBFriends wants to thank everyone who has contributed articles, made comments or read along silently! We are hopeful that this…
- Wounded by the Righteous (30)
May 30, 2012, 10:49
"There is no deeper pathos in the spiritual life of man than the cruelty of righteous people." Reinhold Niebuhr, An Interpretation of Christian Ethics.…
- Parish Nursing (9)
May 22, 2012, 13:58
Last Sat, May 19, 2012, I attended a Seminar on Parish Nursing led by Helen Wordworth, RN from England. This is based on her power point. What is health? In…
- Silence and Solitude (Bonhoeffer) (14)
May 18, 2012, 10:26
Tim Keller writes in the forward of Bonhoeffer by Eric Metaxas that Life Together “is perhaps the finest single volume I have ever read on the character of…
- Listening is Greater than Speaking (3)
May 15, 2012, 16:01
In Community (Chap 1 of Life Together), Bonhoeffer explains what destroys Christian community: “…the human element always insinuates itself and robs the…
- GLBT Evangelism (26)
May 14, 2012, 17:01
Last week, President Obama revealed a somewhat surprising statement: "I've just concluded that for me personally it is important for me to go ahead and affirm…
- Pious Fellowship Permits No Sinners (3)
May 10, 2012, 18:18
A Christian’s “wish dream” destroys Christian community. In Community (Chap 1 of Life Together), Bonhoeffer explains that it is a Christian’s “wish…
- Friendship (50)
May 8, 2012, 08:34
On Sun, May 6, Dr. John Armstrong gave a sermon on friendship at West Loop; here's the video link: Learning to be Friends with Jesus (Jn 15:9-17). His personal…
- Community (Life Together, Dietrich Bonhoeffer) (32)
May 2, 2012, 22:03
Reading Dietrich Bonhoeffer’s Life Together, Richard Foster’s review rings true: “Most books can be skimmed quickly; some deserve careful reading; a…
- Shattered Dreams (4)
May 2, 2012, 13:41
I was touched by this 2 minute video showing God’s grace to one whose dreams were dashed to pieces: Shattered Dreams. It was choreographed by Tim Fitch to…
- In Jail Charged with Sexual Assault (11)
April 19, 2012, 06:58
Yesterday, I visited a former Bible student in jail. Last weekend, he was arrested and charged with aggravated criminal sexual assault and attempted robbery.…
- Healthy and Unhealthy Leadership (12)
April 18, 2012, 10:00
Unhealthy leadership is coercive. Leadership was addressed in my very first blog: Why Do We Have Divisions. Leadership is always important. The future of any…
- Elijah Blew It (T4G 2012) (5)
April 14, 2012, 17:28
This week, my wife and I attended the T4G (Together for the Gospel) conference in Louisville, KY from Apr 10-12. 7,000+ attended with the majority age group…
- Praying like Daniel? (15)
April 10, 2012, 08:52
I recently participated in an encouraging and delightful bible study where we studied the famous story of Daniel in the lion’s den (Daniel 6). In particular,…
- Racism in the Church (23)
April 5, 2012, 07:02
Is there racism in UBF? Might some leaders be racist? If so, is the racism the result of a strong “honor culture”? Some may not like such questions because…
- A Parody: Conversation NOT (19)
April 2, 2012, 11:57
I found MJ’s comment cute. Hopefully she does not mind me re-posting it. It is a parody of two people talking and disagreeing. I found this interesting…
- Abuse, Part II: Spiritual Bullying (72)
March 29, 2012, 10:22
In Part I, Spiritual Abuse: Shape Up or Ship Out, I addressed the spiritual abuse of authoritarianism. In this post, I am confessing my sin of authoritarianism…
- Spiritual Abuse: Shape Up or Ship Out (45)
March 24, 2012, 15:14
For over 2 decades as a UBF fellowship leader, my uncompromising implicit imperative to others was, “Shape up or ship out!” Looking back, it is a surprise…
- The Hunger Games (13)
March 23, 2012, 18:19
For the first time ever, I saw a movie by myself on the first day. I felt odd in that everyone else seemed to be under 30 years old, with the majority under…
- The State of Christianity in Korea (12)
March 19, 2012, 10:12
The quotes below are from a report from a two-day intensive Gospel in the City conference held in Seoul on Feb 20-21, 2012 (written by Stephen Um, a Korean…
- The Importance of Being Disillusioned (26)
March 16, 2012, 12:23
It feels like there is an imposter claiming to be the bride of Christ. She wears a similar veil so that it is often difficult to tell the difference until you…
- Thoughts on Christian Friendship (65)
March 12, 2012, 07:35
Some time later Paul said to Barnabas, “Let us go back and visit the believers in all the towns where we preached the word of the Lord and see how they are…
- The Way of the Cross is Dialogue (140)
March 3, 2012, 10:24
Bowing to alternative views that appeal to us has always been a temptation. We refuse to believe there is only one way of salvation, only one way to the…
- Porn and Christian Leadership (11)
March 2, 2012, 13:12
My first encounter with porn. I first saw porn in 1979 after a friend gave me several dozen Playboy magazines when I was a young doctor in Singapore. I could…
- Sexual Sin and Church Leadership (34)
February 24, 2012, 13:12
Should a church leader continue to be a leader after a sexual sin? I thought the answer was an obvious, unequivocal, “No.” But apparently, church leaders…
- The Gospel and Linsanity (7)
February 22, 2012, 17:08
Is there any gospel in Linsanity? Yes! Linsanity happened because a most unlikely person literally came out of nowhere to become the “savior” for a Knicks…
- UnbeLin-vable! (5)
February 15, 2012, 16:03
I never thought I could be a fan of a New York sports team. Sorry, New Yorkers! Nothing personal. But Linsanity changed me. As we might say, I was "cooked,"…
- My "Worst" Sin: Losing ,000,000! (38)
February 10, 2012, 14:14
What is my “worst” sin? All sin is serious (Num 32:23). All sin leads to death (Rom 6:23). So “worst” is relative; it does not in any way lessen the…
- SCARY Bible Verse: Your Sin WILL Find You Out (22)
February 7, 2012, 11:30
Your sin will find you out. “But if you fail to do this, you will be sinning against the LORD; and you may be sure that your sin will find you out” (Num…
- Love Gone Bad: Demi Moore's Sad Downward Spiral (3)
January 30, 2012, 10:16
I’m really not lovable. A top recent celebrity news is that Demi Moore was hospitalized for inhaling laughing gas on Jan 23. Reports of her being depressed,…
- Joe Paterno’s One Mistake: Should it Define His Life and Legacy? (20)
January 23, 2012, 11:32
Should one mistake define your life and legacy? Greatness and Shame. Joe Paterno (1926-2012) died yesterday. No one can take away his greatness as a head…
- Happy, Healthy, Humble View of Self (18)
January 20, 2012, 18:02
Real happiness. As I have been studying the little letter of Philippians, it is quite fascinating to me that Paul was truly such a genuinely happy man. He…
- The Gospel in "The Descendants" (4)
January 17, 2012, 13:15
If you intend to go and see The Descendants do not read this, for it contains movie spoilers. It won the Golden Globe award for Best Motion Picture drama,…
- Sanctification Versus Perfectionism/Elitism (10)
January 12, 2012, 11:51
This post is my 2012 reflection and prayer for myself and for my local church community: West Loop UBF Church. We had prayed that 2010 may be a year of the…
- Tim Tebow and Paul's Sport's Imagery (7)
January 9, 2012, 12:16
Let me first explain to those who are not living in the U.S. and who are not fans of the NFL (National Football League), because you may not know who Tim Tebow…
- Reactions to Ellerslie? (16)
January 5, 2012, 13:14
During the holiday break, I did a lot of reading, praying and thinking. I happened to come across a preacher named Eric Ludy and the Ellerslie Church. After…
- I Am A Disciple of Jesus (2)
January 1, 2012, 20:47
Today, my friend Henry Asega gave the first sermon at West Loop UBF Church for 2012 and read what has been called “a Zimbabwe Covenant.” I was moved and…
- Daily Bible Reading Plan for 2012: Read Your Bible, Pray Every Day (19)
December 30, 2011, 09:14
When I feel that a patient I visit (I am a home visiting medical doctor in Chicago) will not be offended, I may say to them as I leave their home, “Read your…
- Communicating Genesis 4:7 (6)
December 28, 2011, 12:28
I am a firm believer that grace is the bedrock and unshakable foundation of the Christian life (Acts 20:24). In the NT, the word "grace," a translation of…
- A “Tough” Question: What about the God of Deuteronomy 13? (12)
December 22, 2011, 10:50
As suggested by Ray and seconded by David Bychkov and Oscar, let’s give this question a try without an article. A good friend emailed me this question…
- Feedback from 2011 and Direction for 2012 (35)
December 19, 2011, 11:36
Readers, thank you for making UBFriends a fun interactive Christian website. Jesus says that he came so that we may live life “to the full” (Jn 10:10),…
- Gospel = No Condemnation! Really?? (10)
December 17, 2011, 12:03
Does your God, boss, or pastor look like this judge? This past Mon, Dec 12, I appeared in traffic court for 2 offenses: a moving violation and no insurance…
- What Bible Verses Transformed Your Life? (27)
December 15, 2011, 15:30
This Christmas, consider with thanksgiving the Bible verses that have significantly affected you. Think about them (Phil 4:8), meditate on them (Psalm 1:2) and…
- The King, the Carrot, and the Horse (11)
December 14, 2011, 13:09
Why do you do what you do as a Christian? A previous post, Christianity is the End of Religion, contrasts Religion with the Gospel. As a Christian, we do…
- Christianity is the End of Religion (139)
December 12, 2011, 22:02
Contrasting Religion and the Gospel has intrigued me the last few years. Here is an account from Tim Keller’s book King’s Cross: The Story of the World in…
- Midweek Question: Different Ways to Present the Gospel (64)
November 9, 2011, 13:41
For a long time now, I have been thinking about the various ways that Christians evangelize. More specifically, about how Christians frame the gospel and…
- All Hallows Eve (10)
October 31, 2011, 06:48
With Halloween upon us, Christians everywhere are faced with the choice about whether or not to partake in this annual holiday. Some will choose not to do…
- Reflections at 60 by Sinclair Ferguson (21)
October 20, 2011, 08:00
Greetings UBFriends from Russia! I would like to direct you to a good talk by Sinclair Ferguson (1948 - ). He is a Scottish preacher from Glasgow, but now…
- When Apple lost its founder… (23)
October 7, 2011, 08:47
“Tradition is the living faith of the dead. Traditionalism is the dead faith of the living.” - John Armstrong, during a meeting at Chicago UBF Every once…
- Marriage is Covenant Keeping (70)
October 5, 2011, 13:12
Recently, a friend and member of West Loop UBF asked me about my wife. He and his wife were wondering if Christy, my wife of 30 years, had any sins, since they…
- My Confession, Part II (30)
September 23, 2011, 22:14
In My Confession, Brian confessed how in 1990 he illegally broke into the home of James and Rebekah Kim, the very fruitful Director of Toledo UBF for over a…
- Psychology Meets Religion, Part 3 (4)
September 8, 2011, 06:53
Psychologists have often treated mental processes -- attention, memory, and decision making -- as divorced from the body. As if the mind was processing…
- My Working Philosphy of Education (18)
August 14, 2011, 05:49
I have hardly begun my journey as an educator, which affords me the luxury of being totally idealistic. Though I have read and heard sad stories from America’…
- Rise of the Planet of the Apes (17)
August 11, 2011, 09:52
Ask anyone who knows me and they will tell you that I love film. Although I do not consider myself a “film junkie,” I do see a fair number of movies a…
- The Myth of Multiplication, Part 3 (3)
July 25, 2011, 12:11
In Matthew’s version of the Great Commission, Jesus said, “Go and make disciples of all nations” (Mt 28:19, NIV). For most of my life, I interpreted the…
- The Myth of Multiplication, Part 2 (9)
July 20, 2011, 13:41
In the first installment of this series, I challenged the popular notion that the church expands primarily through multiplication. Multiplication is the…
- Snow (10)
July 20, 2011, 11:53
Perhaps because it is so hot here in the midwest, or perhaps because these words struck a cord with me today, I decided to publish a poem submitted by Brian…
- Why I am Going to the Philippines (32)
July 13, 2011, 07:36
In an earlier post, I explained the spiritual health and vibrancy of Philippines UBF as an indigenous ministry with humble godly servantship. When I last…
- A Church in Denial and Infatuated with Itself (33)
July 6, 2011, 07:50
I recently ran across a presentation by Gary Hamel, an author and management consultant who has been called “the world’s most influential business…
- The Myth of Multiplication, Part 1 (18)
June 29, 2011, 05:49
If you’re as old as I am, you might remember this annoying TV commercial from the 1970’s.The executives who came up with this ad imagined that, if each…
- One year! (3)
June 24, 2011, 22:11
One year ago, ubfriends began with an article entitled, What is good communication?. I thank God who has led many of us to better communication with each other…
- Rethinking Genesis: Man Equals Mission (45)
June 22, 2011, 12:05
Why did God create you? What is the purpose of your life? When I studied Genesis in 1980, I was taught that God created man for mission (Gen 1:28). Dr. Samuel…
- Distinguishing Marks of a Work of the Spirit (Part 3) (2)
June 12, 2011, 14:34
In his prior two articles, Part 2 and Part 1, David began reviewing Jonathan Edwards' writing, "The Distinguishing Marks of a Work of the Spirit of God".…
- Is there a time to use deception to get God's blessing? (59)
May 29, 2011, 19:14
As I read Ben's post earlier this month, What is the Point of Genesis?, I began thinking a lot about my own Genesis Bible studies. I have studied all 50…
- My Son (2)
May 28, 2011, 15:21
As an admin for UBFriends, I've been working with Mary J. on some technical issues this past week. We've also had some intense discussions. For this holiday…
- How Do You Understand and Explain the Gospel? (15)
May 17, 2011, 18:07
One of the issues that I perpetually struggle with is: How do we understand the gospel and faithfully articulate it in these times? Formulaic presentations of…
- My Confession (60)
May 14, 2011, 08:38
To Rebekah B. Kim in Houston: If you are reading this, I want to apologize. I was one of the Toledo brothers who broke into your house one cold winter…
- Walking in the Light of Absolute Honesty (133)
May 8, 2011, 09:22
One word that appears frequently in UBF messages, testimonies, mission reports, and prayer topics is absolute. If you type "absolute" into the search engine at…
- What is the Point of Genesis? (50)
May 6, 2011, 08:07
What is the point of Genesis? This question is especially pertinent to us because, for the last fifty years, the study of Genesis has been the bread and…
- Thoughts on the Death of Osama Bin Laden (27)
May 5, 2011, 08:41
As all of you are certainly aware by now, Osama Bin Laden has been killed by brave Navy Seals who put their own lives at risk to rid the world of him. As I…
- Bringing Reality to the Spiritual Life (Part 2) (12)
April 26, 2011, 09:47
Francis Schaeffer wrote True Spirituality to address the sense of unreality that pervades the faith of modern Christians. Schaeffer was a philosopher, not a…
- Divisions in the Church, Part III (19)
April 25, 2011, 08:29
In my two previous posts, Why Do We Have Divisions? and Divisions in the Church, Part II, I discussed why and how divisions occur in the church. In this final…
- Christ is Risen! (2)
April 24, 2011, 07:19
Christ is risen, Christ is living, dry your tears, be unafraid! Death and darkness could not hold him, nor the tomb in which he lay. Do not look among the…
- I Will Awaken the Dawn
April 24, 2011, 05:38
My heart is steadfast, O God; I will sing and make music with all my soul. Awake, harp and lyre! I will awaken the dawn. I will praise you, O LORD, among the…
- This is the Night (1)
April 23, 2011, 21:40
This is the Night, Which throughout the world Frees all who believe in Christ From the vices of their time-shackled existence, From the lightless dungeon…
- He Descended into Hades (9)
April 23, 2011, 09:49
Many of us recite the Apostles' Creed during our Sunday worship services to profess our faith and to affirm our membership in the universal Body of Christ. But…
- Behold the Lamb! (11)
April 22, 2011, 09:20
The death of Jesus is intimately connected with the Jewish feast of Passover. The Seder, the traditional meal eaten by Jews at sundown on the first day of…
- The Sower (Part 3) (10)
April 20, 2011, 08:44
As I hope I made clear in part two of this series, my preferred way of reading the parable of the sower uses Level 2 (the parable in the narrative context of…
- The Sower (Part 2) (14)
April 19, 2011, 08:29
In my last installment, I gave a brief introduction to the parables of Jesus in the gospels, and laid out a framework of "levels of meaning" that I claimed can…
- The Sower (Part 1) (2)
April 18, 2011, 08:10
This is the first part of a three-part series on the parable of the sower, focused on the version of that parable that appears in Mark 4. In the second…
- Bringing Reality to the Spiritual Life (Part 1) (8)
April 15, 2011, 09:29
Francis Schaeffer (1912-1984) was one of the most influential Christian thinkers of the 20th century. In 1955, he founded the L'Abri Fellowship, a residential…
- Divisions In The Church, Part II (26)
April 12, 2011, 09:31
In my previous post, Why Do We Have Divisions?, I explained the apostle Paul's contention that divisions occured in the church at Corinth because of unbiblical…
- Distinguishing Marks of a Work of the Spirit (Part 2) (12)
April 11, 2011, 09:04
Continuing in the discussion of Distinguishing Marks of a Work of the Spirit of God by Jonathan Edwards, here are the five remaining "negative signs."…
- Navigating the Catholic-Protestant Split Today (42)
April 8, 2011, 08:36
Editor's note: This article was written and posted on another blog about one year ago. Given the discussions that have appeared on UBFriends in recent days, it…
- Psychology Meets Religion (Part 2) (16)
April 6, 2011, 09:45
Which would you rather have: Greater self control or higher intelligence? There are obvious advantages to choosing intelligence. You would have an enhanced…
- A True Church Versus The True Church (35)
April 4, 2011, 09:49
One the most significant trends in Christianity in the United States today is the proliferation of house churches. According to a recent Barna study, 10% of…
- Distinguishing Marks of a Work of the Spirit (Part 1) (4)
April 1, 2011, 08:38
Dear friends, do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits to see whether they are from God, because many false prophets have gone out into the world (1…
- Word, Spirit, Gospel and Mission (Final part) (17)
March 29, 2011, 11:39
Two months ago, I started to write this series of articles titled "Word, Spirit, Gospel and Mission" to formulate answers to some of the mission-related…
- More Thoughts on the Updated NIV of 2011 (69)
March 24, 2011, 05:00
Editor's note: Last month, Ben W posted an article that was supportive of the NIV 2011. The piece below, which was written by Chris Kelly and first appeared on…
- The Brain Science of Ambition (2)
March 23, 2011, 08:25
Yesterday, after we published Gerardo's article on theories of intelligence, a fascinating article appeared on Scot McKnight's Jesus Creed blog: Ambition...…
- Psychology Meets Religion (Part 1) (7)
March 22, 2011, 06:08
As a student of psychology, I encounter many research studies that can speak on matters of faith and personhood. If the Bible teaches us about who man…
- To Stay Or Not To Stay? (462)
March 18, 2011, 09:50
When is it a good idea to stay in a church or para-church ministry, and when is it better to leave? This was the question that Dr. D. Martyn Lloyd-Jones…
- Word, Spirit, Gospel and Mission (Part 12) (7)
March 16, 2011, 19:06
In the last installment, I argued that a major theme of Paul's epistle to the Romans is divine election. Paul didn't answer all the questions that people have…
- How's Your Mark's Gospel Study? (8)
March 15, 2011, 11:08
Have you been taught Mark's Gospel? Has Mark's Gospel been preached to you from the pulpit? Have you taught Mark's Gospel to others? From your recollection,…
- Word, Spirit, Gospel and Mission (Part 11) (6)
March 14, 2011, 10:58
When modern Protestants study Romans, we tend to focus on justification by faith. Our eyes are drawn to Romans 1:17, which many have said is the key verse of…
- Word, Spirit, Gospel and Mission (Part 10) (3)
March 12, 2011, 09:02
In the last installment, I argued that the Great Commission of Matthew 28:18-20 should not be taken out of context and made the preeminent motivator and…
- Word, Spirit, Gospel and Mission (Part 9) (16)
March 10, 2011, 06:54
Election is a controversial concept for many Christians because, in the way that it is often presented, it appears to contradict human freedom. The Bible…
- Mission Versus Sanctification (17)
March 8, 2011, 14:04
In a comment on the article Word, Spirit, Gospel and Mission (Part 8), Joe pointed out that in UBF we rarely preach about sanctification. In Reformed theology,…
- Word, Spirit, Gospel and Mission (Part 8) (25)
March 4, 2011, 10:33
Many Christians have characterized the mission of the church only as winning individual souls. I argued in the last installment that this view of the gospel…
- Philippines UBF: An Indigenous Ministry (22)
March 3, 2011, 05:00
Churches (like companies) tend to experience three phases: an initial phase of rapid growth, a plateau phase, and a final phase of decline. But Philippines UBF…
- Word, Spirit, Gospel and Mission (Part 7) (10)
March 1, 2011, 18:38
At the end of the last installment, I mentioned the doctrine of election. When we hear that word "election," our minds immediately turn to the 400 year-old…
- Word, Spirit, Gospel and Mission (Part 6) (40)
February 24, 2011, 03:00
One overarching theme in the book of Acts is that the mission of the church is directed by the Holy Spirit. The church cannot fully set its own direction,…
- Word, Spirit, Gospel and Mission (Part 5) (16)
February 22, 2011, 11:18
In the last article of this series, I introduced the strange and novel idea of missionaries being evangelized by their converts. The Bible's prototypical…
- Reading, Discussing, Writing (30)
February 21, 2011, 10:09
Reading makes a full man, conference a ready man, and writing an exact man. -- Francis Bacon Bacon adds that if a man writes little, he needs to be really…
- A Question from Ray (11)
February 20, 2011, 13:41
Dear friends: Today a comment arrived from one of our readers. It was originally addressed to Joshua Yoon in response to this: http://www.ubfriends.org/2011/…
- Word, Spirit, Gospel and Mission (Part 4) (13)
February 17, 2011, 09:18
Donald A. McGavran (1897-1990) was born in India as a son and grandson of American missionaries. He served as a missionary in India for thirty years, then…
- Word, Spirit, Gospel and Mission (Part 3) (7)
February 16, 2011, 10:46
From the perspective of the early Christians at the Jerusalem Council, it is understandable that many of them would think that Gentiles should be circumcised…
- Switching to the NIV 2011 (23)
February 15, 2011, 06:02
This year is the 400th anniversary of the King James Version of the Bible. For hundreds of years after its publication, it was the standard English version of…
- Word, Spirit, Gospel and Mission (Part 2) (14)
February 13, 2011, 01:48
It happened about two decades -- only half a generation -- after the death and resurrection of Jesus. The Church was facing an identity crisis that threatened…
- The Difficulties of Genesis 1 (Part 2 of 2) (37)
February 11, 2011, 08:43
In my previous article, I tried to show why the first chapter of the Bible is an exceedingly difficult passage for Bible students. The complexity of this…
- Word, Spirit, Gospel and Mission (Part 1) (16)
February 10, 2011, 06:30
Here is a statement that you might endorse: "The Bible is the authoritative word of God. Refusing to obey God's word in the Bible is an act of disobedience…
- The Difficulties of Genesis 1 (Part 1 of 2) (43)
February 8, 2011, 10:01
One of my last articles on UBFriends was a book review on Stewart and Fee's How to Read the Bible for all its Worth. The authors, who are not only great…
- Counterfeit Gods and the Bible (42)
February 7, 2011, 06:48
Like The Prodigal God (blogged by Henoch), Counterfeit Gods – another great book by Tim Keller — taught me to see and study the Bible in a new…
- Uncommon Aspects of "Common Life" (15)
February 5, 2011, 17:14
He likes the Steelers; I could care less about the NFL. He likes "The Office" on NBC; I love the "Real Housewives of Beverly Hills" on Bravotv. He watches…
- Questions For The Next General Director (80)
February 2, 2011, 08:50
A new General Director of UBF is going to be elected this year. If I had the opportunity to interview candidates ahead of time, these are some of the questions…
- Is This An Authentic Work of the Holy Spirit? (8)
January 31, 2011, 07:32
If you have read my previous articles, then I hope you are becoming convinced that what Christians think about the Holy Spirit really does matter. But…
- The Holy Spirit: Does What We Know About Him Actually Matter? (Part 4) (33)
January 28, 2011, 17:46
Beneath the surface, Christians have many unofficial, unstated, and untested notions about the Holy Spirit that profoundly impact their spirituality. These…
- Beware of the Tiger Mom (16)
January 26, 2011, 10:54
For the last few weeks, the internet has been abuzz with talk of the Tiger Mom. Amy Chua, a professor at Yale University and mother of two daughters, ignited…
- Are You A True Friend? (20)
January 25, 2011, 09:48
The Social Network has recently won the Golden Globes award for Best Picture Drama, and it might also win the Academy Award for Best Picture of 2010. This film…
- The Holy Spirit: Does What We Know About Him Actually Matter? (Part 3) (17)
January 23, 2011, 06:23
If you are a Christian, then you ought to call the Holy Spirit "he" rather than "it." The Spirit is not an invisible power or force, but a person who thinks,…
- "May God Make America a Kingdom of Priests and a Holy Nation!" (86)
January 19, 2011, 08:00
I have been thinking lately about a question that has plagued me since I first came to UBF in 1999: What does the prayer "May God make America a Kingdom of…
- The Holy Spirit: Does What We Know About Him Actually Matter? (Part 2) (3)
January 17, 2011, 13:26
In the last post, I argued that the Holy Spirit plays an indispensible role in our understanding of the gospel. We see abundant evidence for this in Scripture.…
- The Holy Spirit: Does What We Know About Him Actually Matter? (Part 1) (11)
January 13, 2011, 00:01
The importance, nature and work of the Holy Spirit are not well understood by many Christians today. And in that category, I definitely include myself. Since…
- Who Is Our Worship Service For? (16)
January 10, 2011, 08:26
As John Piper said, because God has supreme and absolute worth, the best thing He can give to us is himself. And worship in Spirit and in truth is the only way…
- Overcoming the Male-Dominated Culture of UBFriends (8)
January 5, 2011, 13:31
When this website was launched in the summer of 2010, we had a grandiose vision of a cyber-cafe where people of many different backgrounds could meet and…
- Why Samuel Lee Was Deified and Demonized (163)
January 3, 2011, 12:57
Many readers of this blog may not have personally known Samuel Lee. Lee was a loving husband, a good father, and the cofounder of UBF. He went to be with the…
- Evangelism and the Gift of Missionary (Part 2) (31)
December 17, 2010, 11:41
In Acts of the Holy Spirit (2000), C. Peter Wagner offers an intriguing discussion of the conflict that arose in the Jerusalem church at the beginning of Acts…
- Evangelism and the Gift of Missionary (Part 1) (8)
December 14, 2010, 12:29
Last week, as I was returning from Australia, I began to read Acts of the Holy Spirit by C. Peter Wagner (2000). The author is a former professor of Church…
- The Necessity of Penal Substitution (Part 2) (8)
December 5, 2010, 19:19
In part 1 of this series, I presented evidence from Scripture for Penal Substitution as a primary view of what happened at Calvary. But what about other…
- The Necessity of Penal Substitution (Part 1) (6)
December 2, 2010, 05:00
In the 19th century, the hymn writer Philip Bliss penned the following lyrics regarding Jesus Christ: "Bearing shame and scoffing rude, in my place condemned…
- How to Read the Bible for All Its Worth (16)
November 29, 2010, 09:22
Yes, I know. There are tons of books out there dealing with the subject of how to study the Bible. And you may have read some of them and may feel that you…
- Is 0.3 Percent Enough? (111)
November 12, 2010, 20:43
At last weekend's Harvest Festival in College Park, Maryland, my friend David Kim gave a lively and colorful presentation titled "Fruitful Fishing and…
- Commenting Has Been Fixed
November 10, 2010, 09:54
Dear Readers: Over the last few weeks, some of you have tried to leave comments and experienced difficulty. Without our realizing it, commenting privileges…
- Why Do We Have Divisions? (101)
November 4, 2010, 17:24
What's the problem with the church? Someone said, "The problem with the church is that it has people!" This is funny, I think. But the reality is that…
- Daring To Be Truthful (6)
November 3, 2010, 13:05
Bible-believing Christians maintain that there is absolute truth. We reject the popular idea that right and wrong may be tailored to suit individual preferences…
- Review: Scripture As Communication (6)
November 2, 2010, 09:40
Jeannine Brown's book Scripture as Communication offers the reader a communicative model for biblical interpretation. God communicates with us, and he uses…
- Committed to Absolute Truth (14)
October 28, 2010, 12:00
According to recent estimates by the Barna group, three-fourths of American adults now believe that truth is not absolute, but changes relative to the…
- A Discussion Stuck in Limbo (86)
October 19, 2010, 09:14
Dear Reader: The following is a fictional conversation written to initiate discussion on an important topic concerning different traditions of the Christian…
- Shepherds or Sheep: Who Sacrifices More? (19)
October 14, 2010, 10:56
A while back, one of our readers asked for an article that explores the relationship between UBF shepherds and sheep. Many volumes could be written about that…
- The Next Christendom (7)
October 5, 2010, 09:19
Philip Jenkins, writing in his pre-9-11 book The Next Christendom, laments the fact that religion -- in particular, the dawning of the movement of Christianit…
- Coming Home to Elfland (17)
September 30, 2010, 11:10
Some of us are turned off by the word magic and anything related to it. Our minds are drawn to witchcraft, games of poor repute in the Christian community such…
- We Need Your Help! (4)
September 29, 2010, 12:29
This website was created three months ago. Is UBFriends having an impact? You bet it is. One way to measure impact is to examine the traffic flow. Our…
- Midweek Question: Resolving Conflict (39)
September 15, 2010, 15:55
Last week, the thoughtful Christian blogger Mark D. Roberts began a series of articles titled "What to Do if Someone Sins Against You?" He contends that: Soon…
- Siloam (3)
September 15, 2010, 09:01
Here at UBFriends, we are willing to publish any kind of creative writing and artistic work that honors God. A while back, we received an audio recording of a…
- Do Dogs Go To Heaven? (37)
September 12, 2010, 05:00
A while back, I was in a long car ride with some UBF friends. As I lay back and try to make the best of the situation, I asked a younger friend of mine in a…
- Rebirth in Eau Claire (12)
September 9, 2010, 12:12
In the summer of the year 2000, God led my family to the University of Wisconsin, Eau Claire, where we are currently carrying out our mission work. Eau Claire…
- Writer's Block (7)
September 7, 2010, 07:53
When I told someone recently that I studied Creative Writing in college, he responded, "Oh man, I can't write at all." That's what I typically get when I talk…
- Idolizing Mission? (16)
September 2, 2010, 11:34
Reading through the history of the Israelites in the Old Testament has always been a frustrating experience for me. Here's the reason: The #1 sin that appears…
- Stuck At The Wall (Part 3) (30)
August 30, 2010, 09:45
This is the third article in a three-part series. These articles were meant to be read in their proper sequence. Please do not look at this article this until…
- One Thing Everyone Knows (9)
August 28, 2010, 05:00
For the last nine years, I have been working with people with developmental disabilities. Some of these disabilities are severe and profound. Many of them…
- Stuck At The Wall (Part 2) (12)
August 26, 2010, 05:00
For a long time, I mistakenly assumed that a spiritually mature person is one who directed by faith rather than emotion, one who consistently denies or ignores…
- Diaspora Jews and the Potential of Multicultural Missionary Children (3)
August 24, 2010, 10:34
Over the summer, we have been studying Acts at Lincoln Park UBF. To support his upcoming messages, Pastor Mark asked me to make a slide show presentation on…
- Stuck At The Wall (Part 1) (15)
August 23, 2010, 09:13
For as long as I can remember, I had assumed that the "normal" Christian life follows a pattern. The journey begins when you put your faith in Jesus Christ and…
- The Reflective Bible Teacher (2)
August 16, 2010, 07:53
In 1983, Donald Schön published The Reflective Practitioner. The book is not explicitly Christian. I am not sure whether he is a Christian, as the book gives…
- Kingdom Strikes Back: Mission and Missionary (Part 2) (2)
August 11, 2010, 06:12
The prototype of the"Great Commission" is found in Isaiah 49:6: "...a light for the Gentiles, that you may bring my salvation to the ends of the earth." After…
- Kingdom Strikes Back: Mission and Missionary (Part 1) (4)
August 9, 2010, 06:44
How can we read the Bible through the lens of God's mission? "In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth," speaks about two aspects of God's…
- Individualism, Collectivism, and UBF (10)
August 6, 2010, 05:00
At a meeting of the Evangelical Missiological Society (EMS) back in 2008, one of the presentations that made an impression on me was given by Professor James…
- Good works done for wrong reasons are evil (9)
August 4, 2010, 05:00
When I was saying goodbye to my friends in Hannover, I invited them for pizza and Bible study. Surprisingly, some came. And so we had an interesting group…
- A Holy Nation is a Blessing to Others (10)
August 1, 2010, 00:15
Editor's note: Dr. John H. Armstrong is the founder and president of the ministry known as ACT3, an acronym for Advancing the Christian Tradition in the Third…
- The Time Has Come! (29)
August 1, 2010, 00:00
The moment has arrived. UBFriends has emerged from its construction phase and has officially launched. Our first post is a special piece by our friend John H.…
- This Week's Question: House Church or Family? (30)
July 30, 2010, 11:26
When couples get married in UBF, it has become common to say, "They established a house church." The terms house church and family are used almost interchangeab…
- Why The Sabbath? (23)
July 25, 2010, 05:00
The Sabbath is not on the periphery of the Christian life; it is at its core.
- A Midweek Question (11)
July 21, 2010, 09:30
Here is a question that I have been thinking about: Is it possible for Christians to emphasize the Bible too much in their personal lives and ministries? I…
- The Mortification of Sin (11)
July 18, 2010, 07:00
"Be killing sin, or it will be killing you." How are believers supposed to deal with remaining sin in their hearts? Those who align themselves with Reformed…
- Jamie Oliver and Evangelism (15)
July 11, 2010, 07:00
Have you heard of Jamie Oliver? Jamie is a charismatic, passionate TV chef from Great Britain who knows how to cook and cares about social issues and the…
- The Law of Undulation: a Concept by C.S. Lewis (17)
July 4, 2010, 05:08
In 1942, C. S. Lewis published The Screwtape Letters. The story is written as a series of letters from a senior demon, Uncle Screwtape, to a junior demon (his…
- Did God already answer? (5)
July 2, 2010, 09:39
The other day I walked into the elevator at work and pushed the button for Floor 3. The doors began to close, but then immediately opened back up. So I pushed…
- Sprechen Sie UBF? (22)
July 1, 2010, 08:00
People in UBF speak an unusual dialect. Our conversations and writings are full of UBFisms which are immediately recognized and understood by longtime members…
- What is Good Communication? (58)
June 24, 2010, 10:32
Imagine a "good communicator." What comes to mind? Someone who is confident, poised and articulate, who speaks well in public settings? The gift of articulate…
I’ve definitely felt Christian unity and real communication in our ministry but for the most part it is with people similar to me, especially other second generation college students. We build each other up as we talk about ministry, who Jesus is, secular culture as well as what we often find unappealing about Christian culture. We talk about what it means to be a Christian here and now, but rarely have these conversations been multi-generational or even in the open. It is only us with only our ideas that we don’t necessarily have a forum to voice elsewhere. I am exited to communicate about faith and ministry also with people who are of a different generation and culture than I am. I’m sure that we can learn from each other what we could not have known without each other.
Hi Joe,
You Be Friends is cute, and this website is a great idea, and this very first blog post is quite relevant. Being agreeable while disagreeing is a necessary foundation of relationship and community building, I think.
I’ve shared often with others that the person I most often disagree with on earth is the one I love the most–my own dear wife. Thus, I realize that true unity is not unity in conformity, but unity in diversity, just like the Trinity, for the Father, Son and Holy Spirit are distinctly different, yet perfectly united.
A Christian friend shared with me that a way to connect deeply with ourselves, with others, and to let God speak to us meaningfully is SASHET–Sad, Angry, Scared, Happy, Excited, Tender. By honestly speaking and sharing these emotions and sentiment in our brokenness, frailty and vulnerability, and with trust and respect, enables us to have a heart to heart relationship with one other in the Lord.
If there is anyway that I can be of help, do let me know.
God bless you.
Ben
Awesome comment, Ben from 2010!
Wow, thanks for the reminder, Brian. I don’t even remember that mine is the 2nd comment on this site, or that I used the word “cute” more than five years ago already! But yes, I’ll have to say that you “BE FRIENDS” is cute. It definitely sounds much better than “just obey.” :))
Thanks Ben. One thing that you could do is spread the word to your kinfolk and to members of West Loop who might be interested in writing for us.
Thanks for the post, Joe. I really enjoyed this first post and am looking forward to more!
I have sometimes felt reluctant to communicate and speak exactly how I felt or what I thought with some senior members in my UBF chapter, assuming that I would be misunderstood or my feelings would be misconstrued. However, I have found that whenever I just went ahead and said what I wanted to say, the result was always favorable and it always led to strengthening the relationship and the ministry. I think this reluctance is also sometimes felt by the senior member for the same reason. In the end, I have learned that I really need to trust my brother’s love, then deep communication can occur.
Blessings!
Thanks, Joe, for your thoughtful post. I am not an excellent communicator, myself, and I’m glad to take some time to read your ideas and think about them.
I agree with the four steps laid out in your first paragraph. In my time in UBF, I have improved my ability to understand my co-workers, although that is obviously an ongoing process. I recently experienced the exact kind of communication problem as occurred in Gladwell’s Korean airline example. During a church event, someone asked me to do something, but it took me a while to understand that the person had made a request, because it sounded like an off-hand comment. I had to interpret it as a request.
I also have to work at understanding what I think and feel and then expressing myself in a clear and sensitive way. I sometimes err on the side of meekness and silence, partly because I do not put in the effort of thinking deeply, arriving at responsible opinions, and articulating them in constructive ways.
My comment, overall, is that communication is HARD WORK–especially across cultures! I hope that this website will constitute one step toward a richer, more loving community.
Thanks. I’m glad to BFriends with all of you!
Joe, this is really insightful. Thank you very much.
The dialogues in the cockpit are illustrating so well the difficulties of cross-cultural, cross-generational and cross-hierarchical communication.
it’s exciting to see that people are already engaging in discussion at this early stage. Grace and i will pray that this blog can foster healthy communication and great discussions about things that matter.
Thanks Joe, Ben, and Joshua, who shared opinions.
Understanding a culture is an important issue.
However, there is much more important issue that needs to be considered,
which I believe is mutual understanding mediated by love and respect.
Based on my limited experience, we’ll never be free from conflicting with people. It is nobody’s fault. It’s about mutual understanding.
I do believe that our church (UBF)consists of many people who are mature and generous enough to embrace all kinds of different opinions. So, I recommend all of you to freely speak to senior people on whatever you think is true unless it conflicts the truth of the gospel. :)~~~
Let’s all pray that we have a mutual understanding regardless of age, nationality, and gender. God bless you all!!!
Personally, I’m focusing on mutual understanding more than anything else these days. I decide to listen and be silent until the
and I learned
right time comes, and I learned a lot through it~~~:)
Pray for me to keep silent and listen and learn mutual understanding.
Interesting topic… it reminds me of the presentation we saw at the last staff conference. I forgot the name of the person who presented, but that entire presentation is highly relevant to this discussion. (Joe, any chance you can post a video of that presentation here?)
Bill
Hi Bill, the presenter was Scott Moreau from Wheaton. A longer version of his presentation is on the front page of UBF TV, posted in three parts.
It’s great that many have commented in this pre-launch stage.
For a while I’ve realized that we in ubf have cross-cultural and cross-generational difficulties and differences. But Henoch enlightened me to a third difficulty: cross-hierarchical, which might be an area of highest emotional sensitivity among us, thus causing misunderstanding most easily, leading to a “breakdown” in communication, which sadly has happened too often in various places over the years.
This difficulty is especially so because Eastern cultures is influenced by Confucius, who emphasizes strict order in society. Someone told me that in many churches through out Asia, the senior pastor is functionally a king, whose word and directives are virtually law, which cannot be questioned. Perhaps, this might be an area where we need to prayerfully thread and pray for the Holy Spirit’s guidance and openness. Any thoughts about this sensitive area?
Joe, would you know how to set it up so that whenever someone makes a comment, I would get an my email notifying me?
Hi Ben,
I will work on a system for comment subscription.
Understanding the different roles of order/hierarchy in Eastern and Western cultures is going to be key for this website to work. It is my hope and prayer that someday people of all ranks — new Bible students, committed members of UBF, fellowship leaders, senior missionaries, chapter directors and senior staff — will be able to communicate freely, learn from one another and become friends. As you pointed out to me in a personal conversation last October, the gospel does not simply wipe out all ranks, officies and social positions. There are real differences among us that should be acknowledged and respected. And yet there is a sense in which we are all equals in Christ. Everyone who is in Christ Jesus — from the youngest baby to the most elderly elder — is a member of God’s family by grace alone. It would be nice to see some of our leaders take off their leader/shepherd hats and join in the discussions simply as individual Christians. Our spiritual relationships with one another should be mediated by Jesus Christ, not by UBF or any organization.
That is the primary reason why I decided to start this website as a strictly private venture, with no official connection to UBF and no direct oversight by UBF leaders. I am not going outside the usual channels to cause trouble or to be subversive. I am doing so because I hope that people who come here can truly put aside their organizational affiliation and talk as brothers and sisters in Christ. Because UBF is not the center of our spiritual lives; Jesus Christ is the center.
According to Dante, the entrace to hell bears the inscription
ABANDON ALL HOPE YE WHO ENTER HERE
Perhaps an appropriate inscription for UBFriends would be
TAKE OFF YOUR UBF HATS YE WHO ENTER HERE
I understand that it can be extremely difficult and awkward for ministry leaders to put aside their titles and organizational mindset and have open, honest, give-and-take relationships with people. But isn’t that the essence of the incarnation, of what Jesus has done for us, according to Philippians 2:5-11?
And it will be awkward for young people — especially second gen’s — to speak up and share their honest opinions in a forum where they know that their elders and perhaps even their parents might read it. There is a very active blogging subculture among our second gens, but many of their forums are kept private and off limits to anyone they do not trust. Although I do not expect or want UBFriends to replace those blogs, I do hope that everyone can gradually widen their circles of trust.
In every ministry, there are sensitive matters that cannot and should not be discussed in public so that individuals will not be hurt. But trying to handle everything in private is not a good idea either, because bad things tend to grow in the dark. Gossip, slander, judging one another, etc. Things that can be brought into the light should be. God is light, and his people must walk in the light.
Rather than first approaching all of our UBF leaders and explaining to them what I am trying to do, I have decided to just go ahead and launch this website so that people can actually see what happens here, instead of talking endlessly about all the hypothetical problems that might arise. If this experiment works, it works. If it fails — if people don’t want to come here and talk, or if it degenerates into godless complaining and arguing — then we can just shut the website down, and no harm is done. There is no administrative burden or liability placed on our leaders who are already very busy and are unable to take on new initiatives right now.
If UBF leaders feel that it is too awkward for them to post their opinions here in public, then at the very least I hope that they will visit the website anyway to see firsthand what people are saying and thinking. The honest discussions that take place here could become a valuable resource for UBF leaders, to help them to understand our members and make wise decisions regarding the future of our ministry, because the decisions they make do affect all of us.
Hello!
My husband Ben told me about this website.
I also found the book “Outliers” very interesting, particularly the excerpt concerning KAL.
I wanted to add (I forgot where I heard this), the acronym “SLANT” is a good reminder of communicating and listening well. S = smile L= lean forward and Listen A = ask questions N = nod T = track with the eyes.
I’ve taught and tutored ESL classes for 12+ years. I’ve had students in my classes from countries that I haven’t heard of before meeting them. It’s fascinating to watch students with low power distance indexes interact with students with high power distance indexes. I had a student from Argentina who would feel free to ask a question if something was unclear. She had a low power distance index. Those who had a high power distance index were shocked and even angry at her for speaking “out of turn.” She wasn’t rude or anything, but it was perceived that way by the high power distance index students since they would wait until break time or after class to ask me about something that was unclear (usually a grammar and usage question).
As a citizen of the United States, I have a low PDI so I teach better in a low PDI context. Students who ask questions and want clarification in class will help me teach more effectively and efficiently.
In a ministry, then, we must ask the question, “Is it beneficial to hold to a high PDI in a low PDI culture?” Consider a mentoring relationship in a low PDI context–there will be inherent respect for the mentor, but because of the low PDI there will be more transparency and an “open door” relationship. A real friendship will blossom. On the other hand, assuming a high PDI in a low PDI context will foster deceit on the part of the mentee and “younger” people. There will be a communication breakdown the likes of which Robert Plant and Jimmy Page could not imagine. Conversely, someone with a culturally low PDI ministering to a high PDI congregation should also minister in a high PDI context, even if it makes him or her uncomfortable. For example, a low PDI person may not like titles. If that person is ministering in a PDI context, he or she will have to get used to the title and get used to calling others by their titles for the sake of the gospel (“I have become all things to all people so that by all possible means I might save some” 1 Cor. 9:22).
To sum up, I would argue for a contextual PDI in ministry. (Assuming everyone understands that God, of course, works in spite of our PDI conditioning)
For basic communication, practice SLANT (HT: Maria)
This is the first time I have looked at this interesting blog site. Actually, I’m not much on reading blogs. I don’t even get around to my e mail sometimes. But I hope to check this one out from time to time. Speaking of titles, I just returned from attending the “UBF 1st European Intl’ New Generation Leadership Forum” in Bonn, Germany. I learned a lot. The format was set up to be conducive to letting anyone talk pretty freely what was on their minds about house churches, fishing, dating, marriage, Bible study and becoming a Bible teacher,etc. It was a conference, (oops, not a conference but a forum) run by the New Generation for the new generation. I really appreciated being invited to come and speak, even I am the oldest of the old generation. Sorry my UBF hat is so hard to get off. But I know that you take people as they are.
I’m delighted to see our co-workers share openly about communication within our church community.
Communication is challenging but possible. It takes real effrot to speak to others in a way they can connect with you, and you with them. This is especailly so if we don’t have a common ground from which to relate – culture, age group etc.(Ruthie suggested that earlier)
Although Jesus christ is our common ground, sometimes we feel disconnected from our Christian brothers and sisters. These disconnects often manifest themselves because of manmade structures, human prejudices and fear.
Disconnects ultimately result in frustrations and “no relationship/broken relationships” that do not glorify and honor God.
As can be seen very clearly in the example above where both the captain and first officer in KAl801 could not reach each other even though they spoke, lack of communication can lead to disaster.
Finally, communication cannot be forced, that’s why I’m especially delighted that we have this forum where our willing co-workers may come and freely share. I hope to come often. Thanks Dr. Joe and all who are contributing to this!
“Finally, communication cannot be forced, that’s why I’m especially delighted that we have this forum where our willing co-workers may come and freely share. I hope to come often. Thanks Dr. Joe and all who are contributing to this! – See more at: http://www.ubfriends.org/2010/06/24/what-is-good-communication/#comment-19731
Well amen to that :)
Hi Maria, Love the SLANT, though I feel as though I often slant the wrong way.
Hey Ben, Never heard of PDI, but I’m obviously way way low. Need to think about how that works. Love the Led Zeppelin reference, though non-rock people may wonder if Page and Plant are Christians.
Hi Mother Barry, Thanks for taking off your HAT, especially for me!
Hi Joe, Regarding Dante’s “Abandon All Hope All Who Enter Here,” Paul Zahl, in his great book “Grace in Practice,” said that anyone who preaches a sermon without Grace should post that sign at the entrance of their church on Sun! Funny but true.
I think that comment subscription surely prompts one who made comments, to check on others who commented.
Zahl is a fabulous writer. He has a lucidity and flow in his writing style that brings out the gospel in a graceful way. He gets an “A” in communication for sure.
Hi Ben,
You are right in saying that grace is a necessary ingredient in good communicaion. Provs says graceful words promote instruction…reckless words pierce…the tongue of a fool stirs strife etc.
In the gospel, Jesus holds out grace and truth. It is in striking balance between these two virtues that healthy Christian communities are built and sustained in the long term. Thanks for your comments.
Hi everyone!
I’m so excited for this website to launch and start up.
I was praying for some way to be able to communicate and network with the greater UBF community.
I cannot wait to discuss with everyone and learn from everyone that will participate in this website.
I, too, am learning a lot about the listening part in communication. Communication shouldn’t be one-sided otherwise its more just commanding/ordering/시키는거 (as they would say in Korean).
In the end, I hope for us to grow into the beautiful body of Christ and to love and understand one another as one global community.
Great comments here! ..and this is just the pre-launch section. I will be joining in more actively soon.
Great comments Joe about communication. Since my wife is doing her PhD studies in the realm of digital communication, I’ve been exposed to a lot of ideas (I’ll ask her to post some articles too). Here are a few tips she has given me:
1) Avoid acronyms. If you must use them, spell the words out and put the abbreviation in parenthesis. For example, does PDI above mean Personal Data Interchange or what? I spent the whole time reading the post trying to figure that out…(as a computer geek I must watch this myself closely!)
2) Avoid vague pronouns. Mention people and places by name instead of saying “he” did this or “they” want that, or “it” is good. This creates a lot of confusion in blogging especially.
I think PDI is power distance index. I’ve already twisted Ben’s arm to write an article about that one. I’m twisting lots of arms today.
Ah thanks, sometimes the obvious doesn’t stand out when communicating :) Still, I have little idea what a “power distance index” is or what it means. It would be helpful to understand more. By the way, I will be offline tonight, back tomorrow morning.
Brian,
Point well taken. I need to be clearer in my communication. Thank God for this forum where I can learn clear communication especially through my mistakes. Joe’s writing is an excellent example of clarity.
Really good to see this site – long overdue!
Yet what seems really long overdue is not Koreans waking up to this but nationals. It was hard for KAL to wake up to the issues and took a crash or two. It would be bizarre if an American co-pilot adopted Korean forms of communication when he joined the plane. Yet actually this is what nationals have done for years – and dare I say it American nationals in particular. I’ve never quite worked out why bright young American students in the 1970’s, 80’s and 90’s did not say anything at the time. It never was a good idea to call someone shepherd – of course we should be a shepherd but as a form of address? No. It is odd and always was odd.
I wonder why early generation Americans did not mention this or fight for a change earlier?
Perhaps some feel the plane has crashed and we need to wake up to this cross cultural problem. Ironically the inconsistency and mixed message is actually from the nationals who are now starting to ask these questions not having fought for this sooner. Why 20-25 years late?
Good morning, Paul. Or good afternoon, on your side of the pond. It’s good to hear from you, friend.
Some readers might feel uncomfortable with the bluntness of your comment. But I would remind them that open communication does get uncomfortable sometimes, especially when people have been holding their tongues and keeping quiet for long periods of time. If this blog is going to be a place where real cross-cultural and cross-generational exchange takes place, there will be moments of tension. And moments of grace and forgiveness. We are all going to have to learn to listen to one another and pay attention to the substance of what is being said, and not simply react to the *manner* in which it is said.
It’s hard to believe, but Sharon and I are approaching our 20th (!) wedding anniversary. We are both American, so no language or culture barrier there. We have also recently learned that our personalities (as measured on the standard five-dimensional model used by psychologists) are very similar across all five dimensions. But as we know, men and women come from Mars and Venus, respectively, so communication between us has been difficult at times. It’s only fairly recently that I’ve begun to actually listen to what she says rather than the way that she says it. When she said something that I didn’t like, I would respond with a comment like this: “You didn’t say that in the right way. I won’t listen or respond to that until you say it nicely.” Now I realize that this was my clever way of sidestepping painful issues that I didn’t want to talk about. By constantly changing the subject from *what* was being said to *how* it was being said, I was able to cling to my denial while claiming to stand on the high moral ground. I had to repent of that, and I still do. Basically, I was refusing to communicate with her unless she adopted my own preferred style of communication first. I was forcing her to become like me, rather than being willing to become like her, or meeting her somewhere in the middle. Which is the exact opposite of what Jesus Christ did for us in the mystery of the Incarnation.
Politeness and gentleness in speech is a virtue. But honesty and bluntness are also virtues, especially in places like Britain and Germany.
You raised a good question: “I’ve never worked out why bright young American students in the 1970’s, 80’s and 90’s did not say anything at the time.” Actually, we did ask those questions. One of the first questions that I asked when I started to interact with UBF people is, “Why do they always put titles in front of people’s names?” The answer that I got was, “This is the way that we show respect to one another.” That was an honest answer, and I accepted it as such. And because God was calling me to participate in this ministry depite these cultural differences, I was able to accept and adapt. We have all heard reports of how missionaries came to America and adapted themselves to difficult and uncomfortable situations here to serve American students. Those stories are true. But there were countless ways in which Americans adapted themselves to Korean culture in order to remain in this ministry. Those who were able to adapt did so. Those who were unable to adapt eventually left.
Now about your second question, “I wonder why early generation Americans did not mention this or fight for change earlier?” Those of us who started this website did not do so to fight for change. UBF has always been changing in one way or another, and it will continue to do so. This ministry was started by the Holy Spirit and has been evolving in this complex, fallen world. There is no way that I can change it. If I try hard to change it into something that pleases me, other people will be displeased. We are generationally and culturally diverse, and people of all kinds will need to understand and adapt to one another if we are to hang together and maintain unity-in-diversity. I cannot change UBF, and even if I could, I would not know how to make the right choices. But God knows what he is doing.
As we learn to better communicate with one another — and as our communication is mediated by the grace of Jesus — I believe that our ministry will automatically and organically move in a direction that pleases God. Open communication, mediated by Christ, is the primary work of the Holy Spirit that established the church in Acts chapter 2.
On this website, I would prefer that people not use titles like “Dr” and “Shepherd.” But if some people want to use them, we will not require them to stop. We are all friends here. If some people are unable to take off their UBF hats to join in the conversation, then we will let them keep those UBF hats on. As Mother Barry (oops, I used a title!) said, we are going to take people as they are.
Greetings Paul, and welcome! In the year 2010, we have the privilege (for good or for bad) to use global, instant communication tools, something that might have been a huge benefit in the 70’s and 80’s.
My experience echoes Joe’s ;) My wife and I experienced our 16th anniversary last week. I can still say marrying her was the best decision I made for my practical life. Being that she grew up British, we do have some culture gap. Our children even adopt a British accent from time to time! I must say the British ideas are sometimes vastly different from my good ole’ American country ideas. But we’ve both grown through these differences, perhaps more than we could separately.
I would add to Joe’s comments that in my viewpoint, there never was or is anything to “fight for” in regard to changing our ministry. Koreans adapted to Americans and Americans adapted to Koreans (yes I love kimchee!). I can’t speak to the German/Korean or Russian/Korean or British/Korean experience though.
One reason I’ve remained commited to our ministry is that it is always changing. The Catholic church I grew up in, however, seemed to be stuck in the 15th century and never changing.
Also, in regard to your comment, “It never was a good idea to call someone shepherd – of course we should be a shepherd but as a form of address? No. It is odd and always was odd.” In my opinion, calling someone shepherd is not odd. Our American culture is full of secular titles actually, like my “bff so and so.” The Bible is full of examples of people having new names (like Levi>Matthew), shepherd/sheep illustrations (“Be shepherds…”) and having a new identity in Christ (“The old is gone…”). So from a Biblical context, I’ve never thought this was strange. I don’t associate this practice with Korean culture. In my mind, this came from a desire to help people remember their new identity in Christ. The Salvation Army does a similar thing. And I always appreciate the reminder that I should be a shepherd, as you say. In any case, I’m fine with dropping the titles for the sake of conversation. In my professional life, I’ve never been a fan of titles anyway.
“One reason I’ve remained commited to our ministry is that it is always changing.” – See more at: http://www.ubfriends.org/2010/06/24/what-is-good-communication/#sthash.mqH4JipP.dpuf
LOL. Changing? Hardly.
Good golly, BK! How you’re changed “in the twinkling of an eye.” As Keanu Reeves might say in countless movies, “Whoa!” :D http://files.shroomery.org/files/05-24/885299387-whoa.gif
Well Ben, that “twinkling” happened over the course of 4 years. That’s what happens at ubf, due to the han/malaise that weights heavy on your soul. You think things are changing, muster up enough hope for one more ubf conference, and then suddenly wake up and realize years have gone by… and cannot be retrieved.
So “what happened” mainly is that I took off my ubf mask.
About titles…
When I first came to the ministry, it made me mad. There were some shepherds (the ones who a bit more huffy about NOT being called shepherd) that I would call by their first names on purpose to make them mad (I was a real gem back then).
But after time, I came to understand the role of a shepherd more and got a bit used to it. As a matter of fact, there are some people don’t feel comfortable calling them by their first name because of the respect I hold for them. Maybe I will just start calling them Mr and Mrs…
Here are my lingering issues with the title thing though:
1) I don’t think it should be used when non-UBF people are around, specifically in public and around people who are new to the ministry. The fact that it is such a stumbling block for some people and makes them want to leave before they even experience one to one Bible study is sad. The problem may be theirs, granted, but still we have to help people wherever they are.
2) I don’t like when we call people shepherd right out of the gate. As in – a year into Bible study and we are calling people the same title as someone who has been teaching the Bible to people for 25 years. I think if we have titles, they should be reserved for elders and people who have truly devoted their life to gospel mission, not a young person who said one time they might possibly want to teach the Bible someday. I understand the argument that we want to plant vision in them, but I think the negative consequences for other potential new people outweigh the positives for that one person.
Anyway, that is my tuppence worth… (I will use the British version, considering I am responding to Paul’s comment)
Hey guys, thanks for the interesting discussions!
i think Paul is addressing a very valid point here and i believe that the topic he is talking about deserves further discussion and consideration. Brian pointed out that our ministry is constantly changing. I totally agree. And i hope that this Forum can provide a plethora of biblical thoughts to all of us for little changes in our environment and as the Spirit leads bigger changes in UBF overall.
Paul: First of all, good to see you here! i know that an excellent article by Joe is in the pipeline addressing some of your issues. However, in my opinion, it’s always worth to look at similar issues from different perspectives, even more so if it contains your personal experiences. Would you be willing to give us a piece of your mind by contributing an article?
Okay, I’m one of those guilty of calling others with tiltes. I’m not sure if this is more a cultural thing for me, more than it is out of respect for God’ servants. But I think it is in-between the two.
Growing up in south-western Nigeria, its not difficult for me to see and ascribe respectful terms to those older than me. I’ll say its somehow in-grained.
While it is true that removing tiltels from people’s names does not change anything about them, and niether does adding title put any additional value, it may be sometimes useful to do so within our Christian community. As an example, Apotle Paul constantly refered to himself as an Apostle of Jesus Christ – a servant of God.
I’ll also like to agree with what was earlier said that, the secular world has examples where tiltes are used (and sometimes ecouraged). and by saying this, I’m not suggesting to take cue from secular examples,But I think Briank made a valid point.
If you want titles dropped on this blog fo the sake of unity and frindship, by all means I will do so…
My friend Tunde,
Please do not feel pressured to drop your traditional communication style to please us. On this website, we want to accept people from all cultures as they are. But I am glad that you are willing to try. As the Apostle Paul became “all things to all men,” we have to be willing to change anything — except the truth of the gospel itself — in order to better communicate that truth. I am more than willing to add titles on occasion when it seems appropriate. One of our students here at Penn State pointed out that in every American church that he has ever attended, the pastor was always addressed with a title (Reverend, Pastor, …) and never simply with a first name. However, some churches that really want to culturally connect to unchurched people have even been dropping that practice. Different situations require different practices. It will be interesting to see what kind of communication styles ultimately emerge on this website.
Hi Dr. Joe (oops!) I mean Joe. I feel no pressure at all.
It is good to learn and try new things. I’m willing to adjust for the sake of others, and I assure you that this will not be uncomfortable for me since I know this is what makes you and many of our other frineds (on this site) comfortable.
I agree with the student from Penn state that many American churches traditionally retain titles for people in leadership.
I’m not sure if you are aware that Joseph Magno from Triton was previously in Lagos, Nigeria. He mentioned that thier ministry had a similar debate and they decided to retian the term Pastor for only Pastor Teddy…all other people are called by thier first names.
This raises a question about what we should do about our senior leaders. I’m not sure how we should address them (on this site). I’m speaking of people like Mother Barry, Dr. John Jun, etc.
Dear Joe and others! Thank you for starting this project.
Please excuse me, that I will not engage in the titles discussion. I just want to reffer to this site-blog meaning and what I’m waiting from this. My English doesn’t let me to express freelly everything I want to, so I just share what is on my mind.
Being in UBF ministry during last 10 years, and seeing how the world is changing (At least here in Ukraine the people, their sights and life style etc. seems to be changed so much just in few years) I realized that we should also change our approach or even our minds in order to be successful ministry. And not just to be succeful minisstry but to fullfil God’s will for us. And we do have been trying to change something, to find out the better ways to fuflfil God’s will. But personally I and think others as well met and are meeting many challenges on this way. What shoud be changed? What should be changed in mission, or in me? what should we keep? what new should i learn? HOw I should grow up? 5-6 years ago everything was so clear for me. I knew what I was doing and what I should to do. I’m not speaking about good it was or bad – it just was so. But know I’m just feeling that I could not act like I used to, and I couldn’t think like I used to, and I’m even not that person :). But I should be someone and I want to do God’s work. I need to know how to do it :).
I just thought about a year ago, that may be brothers and sisters in USA and from other countries have the same challenges, so I could prayfully learn from others and get some help. I just hope this site will help me :). I’m praying for it. Dear Lord, please bless our connection here and use it for making through us and in us your wonderful church. Amen.
Again sorry for awryness. If I could speak English more fluently I would express what I want to say better :). So I believe you will accept me as I am :)
As I came to UBF in the mid 80’s, I share Joe’s experience about titles. I was told that to call somebody Missionary X or Shepherd Y is a sign of respect. Nowadays I still use titles for “older” missionaries, but for younger ones and for shepherds not.
My own bible student in the early 90’s, who is now a mature shepherdess, sometimes wrote small notes for me (and still does), using “Dear Shepherdess Birgit”. It sounded so sweet to me, not because I felt proud about my status, but because she was so lovely and trustful.
What I never liked was, when spouses used “my coworker”. When I first heard from my first bible teacher that he wanted to help his coworker, I imagined that he wanted to study Bible with his colleague in his office. Only later I found out that he was talking about his wife who was in spiritual difficulties.
Birgit, thanks for your comment. i’m sure that you have seen Joe’s article on “UBFisms” from July 1st. Calling other people shepherd/missionary surely falls into that category.
I think it is a good idea to openly discuss the origin and background of these titles and also to think about whether it makes sense to get rid of them entirely for the sake of doing better and more effective mission among young students.
Hi, Birgit,
Thank you for sharing your experience about the term, “coworker”~~
I’m a strong opponent for calling someone’s spouse “coworker”~~
Calling someone you have respect for “shepherd” sounds just fine with me although I don’t use that term, either :)
I don’t like calling my wife “coworker” because it sounds like
treating my wife like someone I work with at a workplace. I never did and I will always call my wife “dear Mary, or my wife or honey~~”
Yes! It is awkward and I propose that we don’t use “coworker” for calling
our spousees.
I would second this motion. I have to remember that my ‘co-worker’ severely despises being called this and so I had to drop it. I think that it unnecessarily burdens people to use honorifics. This is part of Korean culture, not American. I prefer the more simple and direct ‘wife.’
Americans in UBF aside have to remember how little connection most internationals have to some of the American cultural tropes we use. I found that, unfortunately, no UBF member really likes baseball, except a few who like different teams. No UBF member actually rooted for the US soccer team in the recent world cup. Those that did found themselves surrounded by beer-swilling, expletive spouting, but not unpleasant salty types. Perhaps, these were the people to whom the apostles were sent. (Mt 11:19) Also, no one in UBF likes the ‘gentle, meek, and mild’ version of the deity that is lionized by many churches here in the States.
Americans like myself have really had to struggle to let go of baseball, and it’s not easy. I pray that God will help me let go of some of the cultural stuff (incessant movie watching) that does not help co-workers. I’m not saying I’ve won this battle, but I’m just putting it out there. I hope this helps people. God bless the mission-centered folks out there.
Hi Andrew. Welcome! I hope we can be mutually encouraged. By the way, thank you for posting our 100th comment here. (No prize, just more articles!) I was wondering though, you wrote “no one in UBF likes…” and “no UBF member..”… are you sure? I would hope we can avoid broad-sweeping, all-encompassing statements like these. By the way, I like baseball somewhat; but am a huge fan of the NFL and the NBA. I’ve seen several Detroit Tigers baseball games with my friends and family. Baseball is much better in person.
Our sitemeter says that we will soon have our 1000th visitor. Not bad for a site that is still under construction.
Hi, Andrew
I love “BASEBALL!!!~~~~” and I used to play it all the time.
I’m dying to play baseball one day.
Maybe it might be a good idea to make UBF baseball, football, or baseketball fellowship, and
each chapter(or united chapters) may be able to play against each other for fellowship once in a while.
Hi James,
Thanks for the comments about BFriends sports. I stand corrected!! May I avoid sweeping generalizations in the future. But really, who isn’t a Cubs fan in UBF? Let’s see about baseketball in the near future.
Who’s the next ‘rope-a-dope’ boxer in UBF? ^_^
Hi Joe (It is the first time calling ‘Joe’ instead of Dr., but I will follow the flow),
My daughter Curie told me about this site and recommended to check it out. Very exciting! I have always cherished what you were doing, and I even more love your inspiration on this.
Hi Young, thanks for your kind words. Please don’t think of this as my website. Although I did get the ball rolling, there are any wonderful friends involved in this project who have been supporting it with their talents and efforts. The fact that a website like this could take shape so quickly, and generate good articles and discussion even during the construction phase, is very heartening and shows that we are already a genuine spiritual community — a flawed one, to be sure, but one in which the Holy Spirit has worked in the past and will continue to work, as much as we allow. Please come back and join in the discussions again.
What a joy to have fellowship in the Lord! Real communication build up the Gospel Truth in our ministry rather than shaking.
Hello Joe,
it’s really nice to see how people get know and communicate with each other. Although I’m not good in English, I hope that I can communicate with all of you, too. My dear sisters were reading this blog and recommended it. At first, I thought that I don’t have to visit this site, but now, I really regret to have not look for this blog 1 year ago. I tried to read all articles in here but that will take much time I guess. The articles are really great and full of grace. They give me strength to handle with problems and questions that I had and could never solve alone at myself. Thank God, that there are people who are willing to share his word!
Thank you, Maria. Your English seems fine to me. We look forward to your comments.
This is a valid point “But you cannot hear a person’s tone of voice or see their facial expressions or body language. You cannot tell if someone is keeping silent to indicate displeasure.”
I am thinking of creating a video blog in the new year, inspired by John: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0G7JN8IYriU
What if we had a blog where people could only submit comments via video? Or better yet, maybe we could hold some round-table discussions on a topic and post the videos as “featured articles” for people to comment on via normal blog or video blog? Thoughts? Ideas? Maybe then we could “look each other eye to eye and be changed by each other” :)
Deja Vu a decade later?: http://www.nbcnews.com/business/korean-culture-may-offer-clues-asiana-crash-6C10578732
Thank you Brian for bringing this to light. :)
Also, thank you for drawing myself and maybe others to the actual article once more. As I read Joe’s references to Korean airline matters I was quickly reminded of the Sewol ship. What a mess indeed! Also, I have no idea about the information from western media reports, but the ownership and operations were run by none other than members of a cult who had no care for the people on board. The government is still attempting to peacefully take the owner (leader) into custody, but have not managed to locate him due to the cult members loyalty.
The tragedy for the 300+ passengers of the Sewol ship while the captain and crew abandoned ship: “Please do not move from your location,” the ferry’s loudspeakers blared at those on board. “Absolutely do not move.”
The most tragic statement that I had read said that those who perished in the ship paid for their obedience with their lives.